


By Your Side

by Coby_Thinks



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Body Horror, Brotherly Angst, Food mentions, Human AU, Look guys this is, M/M, Memory Loss, Multi, Other, Pain, Possible Graphic Scenes, Rape/Non-con - Freeform, Scars, Slavery, Suicidal Thoughts, Sympathetic Sides, brotherly creativitwins - Freeform, enjoy it I guess, i think, idk man I just like writing dark shit, in a universe i created, injuries, it has a happy ending tho, not sure yet - Freeform, probably, probably tho, slave AU, sorry - Freeform, suicidal ideations, this is dark, unsympathetic OCs, you'll see - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-04
Updated: 2020-09-16
Packaged: 2021-02-23 07:33:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 21
Words: 26,068
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23007964
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Coby_Thinks/pseuds/Coby_Thinks
Summary: In a world where your status is decided only by luck, its impossible to know what kind of life you'll live. If you're unlucky enough to be born or kidnapped into slavery, it's hard to say what's luckier. Green eyes, or any other color.Roman and Remus find this out the hard way after being separated after their parent's death. Because while their eye color may seem to promise a life of ease, its easy to wish they'd been born any other way.But maybe fate will give them a happy ending. Their paths are wildly different, but two years after losing each other - and in one case, their memories - coincidence might just lead them on a path to change not only their own fate, but to change the world as they know it.Warnings: rape/non-con, slavery, sickness, body horror, mentions of mutilation, etc.it's a rough one, folks.
Relationships: TBD - Relationship
Comments: 50
Kudos: 119





	1. Prologue

It hadn’t always been like this. When they were kids, under the age of lawful selling, Roman and Remus hadn’t realized how dangerous the world was for people like them. Really, there was nothing about them that was different than anyone else. Only the lines that society, and the people who forced their parents into slavery, had drawn. They didn’t attend school, but the master where they grew up was kind and taught them both to read. They’d worked with their parents, but life really hadn’t been that bad. 

How were they to know that would change when their parents died, taken by a plague that swept through the sheltered valley where they lived. The master died as well, and that’s why the two found themselves in their current situation.

Roman glared protectively around, holding tightly to Remus’s hand. They were twins, but Roman thought of himself as the older one. He was more mature, at least, and it was his responsibility now that their parents were gone. That, and Remus wasn’t like the other young slaves here. He could see that even through the different crowds of people. He’d had gotten sick a lot when they were younger, and he was skinny. He was strong, but he didn’t look like he was.

Roman didn’t have much experience with different masters, as they’d been raised in the same place they’d been born and where their parents had lived for years. But from what he’d managed to glimpse as they were taken away, and from what he saw now in this marketplace, he knew that while he might stand a chance, Remus wouldn’t do well without him. But he had no control over staying with his brother or not, he was a slave. He was less than nothing. The only thing that kept him and Remus from being crowded into the stalls with the many other slaves was the fact that they had green eyes.

He may not have much experience, but Roman wasn’t an idiot. He’d heard their parents, the previous master, and many other people in passing throughout his life comment that they’d be worth so much more than a regular slave. Maybe, just maybe, the random coincidence of eye color could keep Remus from death. But it couldn't keep him from being taken away.

Roman knew as soon as he saw the trader and the completely unfamiliar man approaching. He stepped slightly in front of his brother, offering a small smile of comfort. Remus scowled, stepping forward to be level. Roman sighed internally, but just shook his head and kept his gaze on the ground near the men's approaching feet.

“Here we have a pair - almost a matched set you can see, they’re siblings. Twins, actually.” Roman heard his brother try not to gasp when he was grabbed roughly by the chin, forced to look the man in the eye.

“Similar, yes,” the man scoffed and shoved Remus back, turning to look at Roman. Roman resisted the urge to glare at him. “But not identical, I’m afraid. His eyes are darker, this one. And he’s bigger, takes up more space.”

“Yes, well,” the trader chuckled. “Obviously there’s no requirement to get both, you don’t need two, after all.” Roman felt a thrill of fear race through him and he glanced at Remus, who was somehow managing to keep a stony expression.

“Hm.” The man grabbed Remus again, by the shoulders this time, and forced him to stop slouching. Roman moved instinctively, reaching to protect his brother. The consequence came instantly, a blow to the side of his head.

“Know your place, boy!” the trader snapped as Roman stumbled, nearly falling. Remus stared over at him, expression finally showing some fear.

“How old is he?” the man asked finally, nodding down to Remus. Roman felt tears welling up in his eyes, but refused to let them fall. They couldn't take Remus! Remus was just a kid, they were both kids, but it was Roman’s job to take care of him, and if they were separated what was he supposed to do?

“Just past the legal age for selling,” the trader said with a smug look. “They’re both sixteen.”

“This one’s eyes are very bright,” the man looked down at Remus again and pushed his hair away. “How much was it for just him?” No. Roman didn’t let himself think about the consequences he could face before he pulled Remus back.

“You can’t take him.” he placed himself between the two adults and his brother. The trader looked furious, and the other just a bit annoyed. “P-please, he’s my brother-” Roman interrupted himself with a painful gasp when the trader struck him in the head again, this time with something hard. Roman stumbled, not managing to catch himself this time before he hit the ground.

“Roman-”

“Quiet, you!” Roman looked up with blurry vision as the trader slapped Remus across the face.

“Don’t hit him!” Roman tried to get up, but suddenly there were several of the slave traders there. One held him down, pinning his arms behind his back. “Let me go! Please! He’s my brother!” a gag was stuffed into Roman’s mouth as he tried to struggle. The other two took Remus, binding his hands the way they’d been tied on the journey here.

“It will be five hundred for the smaller one,” the first trader said, seeming to not even notice the struggling boy on the ground. “We can take care of the details over near the office, let’s leave my men to take care of this disturbance, shall we? My sincerest apologies.” Roman tried to scream and pull away as they dragged Remus off, not being gentle or caring that his legs were shorter than theirs. 

Remus glanced back at him once, and Roman saw that his eyes were full of fear. Then a group of people passed between them, and Roman was dragged to his feet to face the other direction.

“Stop struggling and learn your place!” another blow to his head, making black dots dance across his vision. Roman cried out through the gag, but he stopped trying to pull away. It was no use. Remus was gone, and there was nothing he could do about it.


	2. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two years after being separated from his brother, Roman meets some interesting people and his life is changed forever.
> 
> WARNINGS: violence, dehumanization, (calling a person 'it'/an object), PTSD, mentions of mutilation/body horror, injuries, scars, selling/buying of people, Roman's not doing well (but y'all haven't even seen what's happening to Remus yet), implied rape aftermath (nothing excessive and is probs wrapped into the PTSD but thought I'd add this)

“He has green eyes!” Roman rolled his eyes as the man inspecting him gasped. “What on earth - why is a green-eyed slave in here? And why on earth is he in such a bad condition?”

Bad condition? Yeah right. It was all scars and small bruises, nothing like how he was usually treated. He was a troublemaker, apparently. Good.

“This one is a problem.” the trader muttered. “Running, talking back, you can see a previous owner stitched its mouth shut. That was fixed, as it’s illegal, but it’s near impossible to keep it under control.”

“Ah.” the man's facial expression tightened slightly. “Well, there’s nothing wrong with a little personality, is there? It might just make  _ him _ work harder, once he’s treated right.” 

Roman scowled, looking sideways at the trader to see what he would say. 

“Well, I warned you.” he shrugged, “and it’s hardly worth anything. I’d ask six hundred, so I don’t have to pay you back too much when you return it.”

“I doubt I’ll be returning  _ him _ .” the man said, voice tight. He turned to his assistant, who was staring at the ground timidly. “Virgil,” as he addressed the other, his voice softened and changed. Virgil looked up, avoiding meeting Roman’s gaze.“I’ll finish this, why don’t you take him out and wait for us? It will only be a moment.”

“Yessir.” Virgil nodded, accepting the rope the trader handed him with a faint grimace. 

Roman followed reluctantly, entertaining the idea of attacking this kid and running for it immediately. In the end, he decided against it. He was still in the market, for one thing. And this kid reminded him of a lot of the other slaves he’d met. The same body language and haunted look in his eyes - even though he wasn’t dressed as a slave.

“I’m Virgil.” Virgil murmured once they’d stepped into the dusty courtyard, halting under a nearby tree. 

“Yeah, I kinda figured, after he called you that and everything.” Roman rolled his eyes. “I’m not an idiot, you know. And I’m not some ornament for that guy to show off, either. If he wants a green-eyed show-slave, he shouldn’t have been in that section anyway.”

“Whatever.” Virgil looked away, hands clenching tighter on the rope. His knuckles turned white, and Roman could see his hands shaking. What the heck was wrong with this guy?

It was a few minutes before Roman’s new ‘owner’ joined them. He smiled, cupping Roman’s chin to look at his eyes again. Roman glared at him.

“Can’t blame you for causing trouble,” the man mused as he let go, holding his hands up. “I’m Thomas - come, I’ll explain more when we get out of here.”

“Explain what?” Roman asked sourly, following Thomas and Virgil despite himself. 

He may hate all slave-owners, but they were usually better than traders. And easier to escape from. His question remained unanswered, and Roman sighed unhappily as they made their way toward the very edge of town - where the houses were huge and far apart from each other.

They stopped at a house almost as big as the one Roman grew up in - though it was a city mansion, not a farmhouse.

The first odd thing was the fact that they walked in through the main front door.

The next was that as soon as the door was closed, Virgil was untying Roman’s hands and pulling him into the kitchen, where an elderly woman waited with water and bandages.

“Wh-what the heck?!” Roman pulled away, backing into the wall. “What is going on?”

“Stay calm,” Thomas reached for his shoulder and Roman winced. To his surprise, the man didn’t grab him as expected. “We just need to look at your wrists. The rope they use is unsanitary and dangerous. Especially for someone who rubs against it as much as you.”

“...okay.” Roman glanced down, wincing at the raw flesh on his wrists and forearms. “You better tell me what the heck is going on because I’ve been around long enough to know that this isn’t how things work.”

Thomas laughed, stepping back as Roman shuffled to where Virgil and the woman were waiting. 

He wasn’t sure what to make of this, but if they were offering to keep his wrists from getting infected again, he was going to accept it.

“Well first things first, want to tell me your name?” Thomas sat across the table from him, making no move to touch or grab him again.

Roman hissed as the woman started cleaning the wounds, but he kept his gaze on Thomas.

“I’ve gotten a different one at every stupid place. Take your pick.”

“ _ Your _ name. The one your parents called you, or the one you call yourself.” Thomas replied softly.

“Oh.” Roman stared at him for a moment, then to Virgil, who was watching both of them with wide eyes. “Uh, Roman. It’s Roman.” When he said this, he saw the faintest flicker of shock in Virgil’s eyes, but it quickly vanished.

“How old are you?”

“Eighteen.” Roman frowned, looking to the woman as she finished bandaging his first wrist and moved to the next. “Oh.. thank you?” she smiled.

“Anything for you, my dear.”

“Who the heck are you?” Roman demanded across at Thomas, who smiled sadly. “You buy slaves - you buy people like they’re a piece of meat - and then what? Terrify them into silence? Brainwash them into only saying kind things?”

“Shut up!” Virgil suddenly snapped. Roman looked over in surprise. Virgil’s face had twisted into a scowl, and he walked over to get in Roman’s face. “You have no idea what you’re talking about! Thomas is the only reason you’re not going back to someplace that’ll end up killing you!”

“Vee,” Thomas sighed, rubbing his eyes.

“What? He can’t talk to you like that!”

“Who are you?” Roman asked again, folding his newly bandaged arms on the table.

“I’ve never liked the idea of slaves,” Thomas said slowly. “But, I inherited my uncle’s estate, including several.” he inclined his head toward the woman who had cleaned Roman’s arms. “And I realized, with the new resources I had, there was something I could do to make a difference.”

“Right…” Roman glanced at Virgil, who was staring moodily at the floor.

“Every slave I’ve ever taken from the trading stalls, I’ve freed,” Thomas stated, folding his hands on the table-top. “Some of them stay and help me run the place, but they’re paid and treated well. Others, I help out of the province and get them started someplace. The farm keeps me from going bankrupt, and I’ve met a fair share of people with a fair share of stories.”

“Right.” Roman wasn’t sure what to believe.

“And to tell the truth, your reputation precedes you.” Thomas chuckled. “You’ve been legally old enough to sell for two years, and yet half the people in the province have had you at one point or another.”

“Yeah, well that’s not my problem,” Roman muttered. “What are you talking about?”

“There’s another place I’ve heard of a green-eyed slave with a temper.” Roman’s eyes widened and he snapped forward.

Remus.

“You know my brother!?” 

“I do,” Virgil said softly. Roman turned to him instead, heart pounding. “He… uh, we were owned by the same person a year or so ago. He was always talking about his twin, Roman.”

“Where is he?” Roman stood up, shoving the chair back. “I’ve been trying to find him for two years, and there’s no way I’m letting either of you stop me if you know where he is!”

“I-I don’t know.” Virgil stammered, stepping back slightly. “W-we aren’t… we weren’t… I was a labor slave. R-Remus was… a … more of a…”

“Decoration?” Roman asked, feeling exhausted all over again. He slumped back into the seat, putting his hands over his eyes.

“When they sold us… I don’t know where he went.” Virgil finished softly. “B-but once… when I found out what Thomas did… he said he’d help me find both of you.”

“Why?” Roman muttered to himself. “Why the heck do people care about the color of our eyes? Why the heck do people think… why?”

“He was always talking about how you must be blaming yourself…” Virgil added softly. 

Roman laughed bitterly, slumping and resting his arms on the table, closing his eyes. 

“You don’t get it. Remus isn’t… we might be the same age, but I’m the big brother. I’m the healthy one, I’m the mature one, I’m the one that was supposed to protect him.”

“I’ll try my best to help you find him,” Thomas said softly. “Every time a new… every time a new market opens I’ve taken Virgil with me to help try and identify you, or anyone else he knows. I can do the same for you.”

“You’re sure he was sold at the same time as you?” Roman asked grudgingly, lifting his head to look at Virgil. Virgil nodded.

“We… both caused too much trouble. Instead of punishing us, that particular master just found it easier to sell us.”

“Of course.” Roman sighed. Of course, Remus was causing trouble - why wouldn’t he?

“For now,” Thomas stood up. “I need to have Abigail check you for any lasting injuries or infections, and for you to get cleaned and rested. I understand that it’s unlikely for you to trust me, and Virgil can help you if you’re more comfortable that way.”

“If this is a cruel joke, I’ll murder you,” Roman muttered.

“Not a joke,” Virgil said softly, then smirked. “Cruel or otherwise.”

“Well, I’ll leave you three for now.” Thomas stood slowly. “I promised I’d join the kids in the garden today. I’ll see you all at dinner.”

Roman watched curiously as he left, then looked over when Abigail tapped his shoulder.

“I just want to check your back, darling,” she said in her soft raspy voice. “You can’t tell me you haven’t felt the lash.”

“Oh, right.” Roman flushed slightly, pulling his ragged shirt over his head, folding it before setting it on the table. Abigail pulled him to his feet, tracing her fingers along the marks on his back. Roman shuddered, trying not to cringe away from her.

“No infection, it seems,” Abigail said after a moment, taking her hands away. “Any other places to be worried about, love?”

“Don’t think so.” Roman pulled his shirt back on, mind still spinning.

“Wanna go get cleaned up?” Virgil asked, not meeting Roman’s eyes. “I can also answer any more questions you might have.”

“...fine.” Roman sighed, shoulders falling. For now, he’d see what happened. If Virgil really did know Remus… well, that was more than he’d gotten since they were separated. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo yeah. thoughts? I tried my best lol this isn't my greatest work but I like the story so *shrugs*  
> lemme know what you think!  
> Love you all,  
> -Coby


	3. Remus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> if you guys were worried about Remus before... well, let's just say you definitely should have been worried about Remus. and you should still be worried. You should be very worried.
> 
> WARNINGS: selling people, slavery, rape/non-con, abuse, violence, mentions of head injuries, memory loss, dehumanization, PTSD, trust issues, self-deprecation, self-hatred, suicidal ideation/suicidal thoughts, food mentions

“A bit young, isn’t it?” someone gripped Remus’s chin tightly, inspecting his face. He tried his best to ignore them, being used to this by now. He could fight back, yeah, but he was tired. No one was willing to whip a green-eyed slave, not unless they were really deserving. Instead, to keep him from getting scars, they cut his portions of food and water. So, yeah, he was tired.

“Just appears that way!” The trader declared. “Eighteen years old, this one. Not a scratch on it, though it’s not the most obedient item.”

Remus rolled his eyes at this, being called an ‘item’ was getting old. Why couldn't they just kill him and get it over with? At least then he’d be with his parents, and maybe his brother. He winced slightly at the thought, shaking his head a bit.

“Hey, stop that!” Remus winced when the trader knocked on the back of his head. Oops. 

No one wanted to whip him. That’d leave scars. But bruises faded, and concussions just made him more docile. So it probably made sense that he didn’t have the greatest memory. But to wake after one beating without his brother's name, or face, in his mind had been the worst thing ever. Remus barely remembered being a kid, or a teenager, and all he knew was that his parents were dead and he had a brother somewhere. Maybe his brother was dead, too. Lucky. 

“I suppose it’ll do.” the voice said, and Remus blinked a few times to focus the world around him. “That was eight hundred?”

“Eight fifty.” the trader corrected, accepting the coins and handing the rope over to one of the slaves accompanying Remus’s new master. 

Remus sighed tiredly, following them out of the marketplace. He spaced out again, though, already bored of the new situation, once he’d been shoved into the back of a wagon with the other two slaves. He only snapped out of it when the wagon stopped outside a gigantic house - far enough away that it was the only building in sight.

“Take it around, get it presentable.” the master said carelessly, waving at the pair of slaves that had been with them. “And do it quickly, or you’ll wish you hadn’t been born.”

Wow, what a creative threat. Not. He let himself be pulled around to the back entrance, only glaring when someone tried to talk to him. Just like with every other stupid place he’d been sold to, he was dressed in elaborate, skimpy clothing before being presented to the man who’d bought him.

“Ah, see?” The man smiled, taking Remus’s chin gently with his fingers. “You were a bargain, boy. If those damn traders would care to present you correctly, they’d be far richer than they are now. Imagine. A young green like you for only eight fifty? That idiot has no idea what you’d go for on the black market.”

Oh, the black market? Interesting. Remus stared impassively up as the man stepped back, walking around to look at him again. 

“Now, you’re only eighteen, aren’t you?” Remus hesitated, waiting to see if the question was rhetorical. Turns out it was. As usual. “I wonder how many places you’ve been to after turning legal. Hmm, and it’s always a funny thing to consider if your previous owners cared about legal sex slave laws. I wonder…”

Oh. Oh shit. Remus felt himself pale slightly, breath catching. He was used to this. He was used to being paraded around like an ornament or a pet. He was used to grown adults looking at him with that expression on their faces. But the fact was, he was barely legal. And he’d been moved around too much because of his ‘behavior’ to really risk being taken advantage of.

But this master was correct. It was perfectly legal for him to do whatever he might want to Remus - short of mutilating him or killing him without reason. 

“Ah, that’s what I thought.” the man stopped in front of him, cupping Remus’s jaw in his hand. Remus swallowed, trying to keep the same bored expression on his face, but he’d already shown too much. “That must be why you’re still so impudent, too. Breaking you without ruining your pretty face, or your innocence, is much harder.”

Remus held back a shudder at the feeling of this man touching him, now that he knew the creeps intent.

“The younger I break you, the more you’ll earn me on the underground.” the man reasoned, brushing Remus’s hair from his face. He nodded, as if making a decision in that moment - though Remus was sure he’d planned this from the beginning. “Come, boy. No time like the present, after all.”

Remus could do nothing as the ropes holding his hands were gripped tightly, and he was pulled up the stairs into the confusing hallways of his master's house.

Well shit. Now he really hated the fact that he had green eyes.

* * *

Remus curled in on himself, lying sideways on the small, uncomfortable cot he’d woken on after his first ‘session’ with his master. He’d passed out. It had hurt so bad, he felt so gross. He’d been cleaned while unconscious, but Remus knew that the master had continued with his activities even after Remus passed out. It hurt, and he felt sick and tired and scared. 

Though, to be fair, the room he was in was a lot nicer than most of the places he’d lived. It was small, and there weren’t any windows, but he was alone. And there was the cot, and while it was uncomfortable, it was nicer than most he’d had. 

It was certainly nicer than the last house he’d belonged to, where they kept him in a gigantic ornate birdcage with nothing but the cold metal to sleep on.

Remus shuddered, wincing as pain throbbed from between his legs. He was really, truthfully, lucky that this hadn’t happened earlier. That he hadn’t been taken advantage of before it was legal. Sure, there were regulations, but no one really cared. Not that much. He’d just been insanely lucky.

It was times like these that he pondered his brother the most, though. What was his brother like? Was his brother still alive? Did his brother still remember him? He should. It had only been two years, hadn’t it? Maybe his brother hadn’t been knocked on the head so many times he forgot his own name. Remus couldn't even be sure his name was Remus, after all. The other slaves had just told him that when he woke with barely any memories. And none of his masters ever called him that. They gave him a new one every time. 

Was Remus’s brother in the same situation? Had he been broken earlier, illegally? Did his brother even have green eyes? Maybe Remus’s brother was a labor slave or had been sold into the war efforts. Maybe Remus had crossed paths with his brother and neither had known it.

Maybe he’d never know anything ever again.

Maybe he’d never see his brother again.

Remus laughed to himself.

He most definitely wouldn’t see his brother again. He was alone in the world, and that was just how it was. He had no friends, no family, and no way out. 

Lucky him.

Remus jumped when the door opened, light spilling onto him. He recovered from the surprise and scowled, glaring at the figure there.

He didn’t recognize this person, though. It wasn’t his master and it wasn’t one of the slaves he’d seen previously.

In fact… Remus sat up slowly, wincing as he caught more of this person’s features. This person was unlike anyone he’d seen before.

Green eyes were considered better than others, for some reason. And while Remus had two bright green eyes, the person standing there only had one.

To clarify, he had two eyes. But one was brown, and the other was a green that rivaled Remus’s own. 

In fact, this slave was dressed similarly to the way Remus was.

So this was another of the sex slaves.

Why was he here?

“You’re awake.” the person noted, sinking to his knees next to Remus’s cot. Remus glared at him.

“Yeah, no shit. What do you want?” he snarled. The other regarded him coldly, and something about his mismatched eyes made Remus shiver.

“I’m Dee,” he said. “And I wanted to check on you. You’re just a kid, and I know… ‘master’ can be cruel. So…” Dee waved a hand toward him. “Are you okay?”

Remus stared for a moment, mind spinning as he struggled to comprehend what the other slave was saying. Damn. Sometimes he really hated what all those concussions had done to his head.

“You don’t really care.” he finally decided, narrowing his eyes. “You just want me to like you, right? Well, I don’t. And I don’t care what you say, I don’t trust you.”

“What's your name?” Dee asked as if Remus hadn’t spoken. Remus frowned, staring at the floor. “The one your parents gave you.”

“...Remus.” he finally muttered. “I think so, at least. I uh… don’t remember much. Of anything. At all.”

“Oh.” Dee’s face finally betrayed some emotion. Sympathy. Remus felt sick, weak and useless all over again. He was always sick and weak and useless. “Um, okay. You want me to call you Remus, then?”

“I don’t care what you call me.” Remus snapped. “I don’t trust you, and I’m not going to care about what you say. Fuck off.”

“Are you hungry?” Dee asked, nodding toward the door. “We’re allowed to mingle in the slaves quarters, and there’s bread out there. You had a rough day.”

“Really? I hadn’t noticed!” Remus snarled, shoving Dee away. Dee didn’t seem bothered, but finally stood up and dusted himself off. “Leave me alone! Maybe I want to starve to death, you ever think of that? Maybe I want to shrivel up into a raisin and get eaten by vultures!”

“I’ll leave the door open, then.” Dee brushed back his hair. “Do whatever you want. Just don’t leave the slaves quarters.”

“I’ll do whatever I want!” Remus hissed once again, hugging his knees to his chest and glaring as Dee stepped out.

He felt sick and weak, and useless. Just like always. Except now, he also felt used and gross and… broken. Tears welled up in his eyes and he buried his face in his knees.

He wanted to fucking die.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yikes. I'm not sorry, but yikes.  
> so yeh! thoughts? death threats? key smashes? lemme know!  
> This is also meant to be a steampunk universe, so if you have any tips on incorporating that into this then let me know!  
> love you all,  
> -Coby


	4. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> HEYO! One good thing about quarantine, I'm getting a lot more writing done. So, have another chapter!
> 
> Warnings: death mentions, sickness mentions, slavery mentions, slavery, mentions of body horror, injury mentions, past rape/non-con, swearing (thanks Virgil), PTSD, and angst (but are you surprised? probs not. I love angst)
> 
> Enjoy!

Once they started talking, Roman and Virgil stayed up into the early hours of the morning. That, and Roman felt better than he had in a long time. He was clean, wearing new (actually new, not just new to him) clothes, and sitting on a comfortable chair on the back porch of Thomas’s house.

“As far as I know, no one ever hurt him,” Virgil said slowly, carefully, in response to Roman’s question. “Not enough to leave scars or anything. He did say that food and bruises were ways people liked to discipline him, though. Because of his eyes.”

Roman nodded, heart sinking. Remus had never been the healthiest kid, so hearing that he was kept from eating was a worry. But he’d been alive a year ago. That was more than Roman had known yesterday. 

“How did you end up as a labor slave, anyway?” Virgil asked after a beat of silence. “You have green eyes too. Sure, yours are darker and could be blue, but still. Very green.”

“Ah.” Roman sighed, looking out at the garden - where a gaggle of kids was playing tag in the evening light. “Well, at first I wasn’t, of course. I was…” what did he even call it? “Decor.” he settled, unhappily. “But I’m bulky, muscles and bone. A lot of green-eyed slaves - at least the ones that last - are more like Remus. Thin, small, easy to ignore, elegant, I guess.”

“Yeah, cuz Remus is elegant.” Virgil snorted, and Roman cracked a smile.

“More than I am, I’m afraid.” he rubbed his eyes. “I basically just gave everyone so much crap and refused to not help the labor slaves that they gave in and made me one. Not that it stopped them from selling me to people who tried to get me to fall into their idea of what I should be.” 

Roman traced the bumpy scars that marred his face around his mouth, shuddering slightly. It had never healed right. He’d never look like a person who hadn’t gotten their mouth stitched shut.

“Sorry.” Virgil murmured, looking guilty. “Y’don’t have to talk about it, y’know.”

“Ah, I don’t care.” Roman lied, shrugging. “I can’t change the fact that it happened, and you can obviously see that they weren’t careful with me.”

“That's so fucked up,” Virgil muttered, eyes drifting over Roman’s face. “I mean, why would anyone do that if they wanted you to be a decoration in the first place? What’s the point?”

“The person who did this…” Roman grimaced, stomach twisting. “They didn’t want a decoration. They uh… they wanted a toy, I guess. And they didn’t care what they had to do to get one.”

“Oh.” Virgil fell silent, and they both sat listening to the laughs and shouts of the kids. “That’s fucked up. And illegal, seeing as you - how long have you been eighteen? A month?”

“And a half.” Roman frowned curiously. “I was their property, Virge. How was it illegal to want…”

“There are still regulations!” Virgil explained agitatedly. “It's illegal to take advantage of a slave under eighteen. Like it's illegal to sell if a slave is under sixteen years old, and it’s illegal to permanently disfigure someone past recognition or function.” he gestured to Roman’s face. “It's illegal to force relatives into sex, it’s illegal to kill or maim a slave without giving a reason for it on a document in court…” he stopped talking and made a face. “It’s all so fucked up, Roman. There are people like Thomas who are doing their best - making these laws and trying to end this shit. But there are people who don’t care. Because, yeah, they don’t think we’re people. But it's not like we aren’t human. Half of us weren’t even born into slavery!”

“Really?” Roman frowned. How the heck would someone just become a slave, then? It's not like they’d choose it. Though, his parents had never clarified that they’d been born into it either.

“You were?” Virgil frowned in surprise. “That’s really weird… most green-eyed slaves were the kids of nobles or something.”

“My parents were slaves.” Roman nodded unhappily. “My mom had blue eyes, and my dad had grey. I dunno how Remus and I ended up with green, but…”

“I grew up with my dad,” Virgil said softly. “He was a ship captain. When he died at sea, I was like… nine or so… the first mate told me I was his responsibility now. That apparently meant he gifted me - note the fact that he didn’t sell me - to a friend as a labor slave. And then I finally ended up with Thomas. And that’s that.”

“Sorry,” Roman said, though he wasn’t sure it helped at all. Virgil shrugged.

“Like you said earlier, it happened.”

Roman nodded, looking over as the group of children stormed up the porch steps, talking and laughing as they headed to bed. Thomas stood at the door, smiling. He met Roman’s eyes for a moment, and the smile turned sad. Roman looked away.

He still wasn’t sure how much he trusted Thomas.

“He really is a good person.” Virgil murmured. “He might not understand, and he might have been born into wealth, but he’s a good guy. If you don’t trust him, that’s fine. But try and trust me?”

“I do trust you,” Roman said. “I trust too easily, though, so take that with a grain of salt.”

“Really?” Virgil chuckled slightly. “Remus doesn’t trust anyone. Took me ages to get inside his shell.”

Roman nodded, staring at his hands.

Remus.

Fuck, Remus Remus Remus.

A year ago, Roman had already been mostly a labor slave. Remus, according to Virgil, hadn’t been. And according to Virgil, the chances of Remus being raped were now higher than ever.

“I sent a telegram to Joan,” Thomas said once the last of the kids were inside. “They’re a friend from another province, and they keep a close eye on the trade caravans and black markets there. Obviously we were already wanting to find you and Remus, but now they know you’re here.”

“Right.” Roman nodded sullenly. “Thanks.”

“It's nothing,” Thomas said. “Curfew is about to set, though. You two better sit inside to talk.”

“Oh yeah.” Virgil stood up, stretching before he nudged Roman. “C’mon, Ro. you can stay in my room or take one of the guest ones. Whatever you want.”

“Oh.” Roman followed him inside, still wary of Thomas - though the man left them alone once they were in. “uhm… I’d prefer to not be alone…”

“Chill.” Virgil waved him toward the stairs. “C’mon. I’ve got an extra bed, so no worries.”

“Right.” Roman couldn't help the relief that swept through him, and he followed Virgil up to one of the rooms. 

It was cozy. Cozier than anywhere he’d ever slept in his entire life. A twin bed sat in each corner, and Virgil flopped onto the one with purple blankets. Roman awkwardly sat on the edge of the other, looking around at the room. 

It was mostly simple, with a single decoration. An elaborate bronze clock, ticking softly. It reminded him of the one in the room he’d shared with Remus when they were younger. Sure, that one had been simpler, more functional than anything, but a clock was a clock.

“We’re gonna find him.”

Roman looked over, meeting Virgil’s intense gray eyes.

“We’re gonna find Remus. We’re gonna change things.” Virgil continued firmly. “Thomas has been working so hard for all his life - he wants this to end.”

“This?” Roman frowned.

“Slaves.” Virgil gestured to the window. “It’s ridiculous. Most people know that. Did you know that half the provinces have banned it already?”

“What?” Roman stared at him. 

“Yeah. There’s only a few left that still legally allow it. And there’s a bunch of shit, still, like black markets and stuff.” Virgil sighed, rubbing his eyes. “But we’re going to end it. And we’re going to find Remus.”

“Yeah.” Roman ran a finger over the blanket beneath him, wondering how he’d managed to catch Thomas’s eye earlier. “Yeah, I know.”

The two sat in silence for a while, Roman staring idly at the clock, trying to gauge how many intricate gears make it work.

“Tell me more about Remus,” Virgil said slowly. “From before. When you guys were kids. He didn’t like to talk about it, but he said you were close.”

“As close as we could be, I guess.” Roman laughed sadly. “He, I told you earlier, he got sick a lot. Always did, and I dunno why. I hardly ever get sick. But I’d work with our parents - once I was old enough to help - and we’d play when there was time. The guy who ran the farm…” Roman sighed. “He was nice. He taught us how to read and write, and promised never to sell us. He probably knew how shitty it’d be for us.”

“He lied?” Virgil asked curiously. Roman shook his head.

“A plague killed him and our parents,” he mumbled. “Almost took Remus, too, actually. And once it was over, the farm was split up and the slaves were all sold. So, here I am.”

“That sucks,” Virgil said. “...you can read?”

“And write. And I can do some math…” Roman made a face. “Haven’t for a while, though. Haven’t read anything for a while, either.”

“What do you like to read?”

“Everything.” Roman grinned. “But mostly stories. Fairy tales, y’know?”

Virgil nodded, rolling over to hang off the side of his bed. Roman frowned, watching him. What on earth was he doing? Was Virgil crazy? That might make sense. Maybe this was all a trick.

“Here.” Virgil pulled a battered leather book from beneath his bed, blowing the dust off the cover. “It’s a book about pirates, which is kinda like a fairy tale. My dad had a copy of this, and when Thomas first paid me… it was what I wanted to buy.”

Roman walked over, joining Virgil on the bed, and took the book gingerly. Despite the way Virgil spoke, fondly, it didn’t seem like he’d read it very often. And Roman knew how to tell a well-read book from a new one.

“It seems like new.” he hummed, running a finger over the lettering.

“Ah,” Virgil cleared his throat awkwardly. “I uh… I can’t read. My dad didn’t have time to teach me, and then… well, slaves don’t need to know. Thomas is trying to teach me, but he has so much going on…”

“Oh.” Roman frowned for a moment, gently opening the book to the front page. “Well, I could teach you. I guess. I dunno if I’ll be any good, but…”

“Just read it right now.” Virgil scooted away, lying to stare at the ceiling. “We can talk more in the morning.”

Roman hesitated, then started reading aloud, making Virgil look over at him. He ignored it, though he knew that wasn’t what Virgil meant. He liked reading, and he’d always read to Remus when the other was sick. 

For the first time in a long time, Roman started to feel like he might actually be able to read to his brother again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hahaaa I know y'all wanted to know what happened to Remus, but I had to get a Roman chapter in.  
> and also Remus isn't in the next chapter either   
> BUT HEY!! Content!!! IT'll be fine!!! Don't worry about him!!! (do. do worry about him. worry about all of them. I'm going to hurt them all so much. I'm not even sorry.)  
> Love you all,  
> -Coby


	5. Patton

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Patton grimaced, tightening his grip on the person he was holding. This was bad. Not awful, but not good. He’d definitely seen worse. But, it was still pretty bad.
> 
> Warnings: injuries, mentions of war, mentions of slavery, etc.

Patton grimaced, tightening his grip on the person he was holding. This was bad. Not awful, but not good. He’d definitely seen worse. But, it was still pretty bad.

“Hey, you’re alright,” he grunted, unsure if the person could hear him. “We’re almost there.” the injured slave just whimpered, holding tighter to Patton’s shirt.

Finally, he spotted the purple-tinted light in the darkness, and he licked his lips before whistling a five-note tune. The tune was sent back, and Patton smiled.

“See? These guys’ll patch you up and you’ll be okay. You’ll be free.” he said, stumbling slightly as he picked up the pace. He met Joan by the porch, and the injured slave was taken from his arms.

“Bullet to the leg, head injury, might be a concussion.” Patton listed off, following them inside. “Another abandoned on the field because of status.” he paused, looking at the floor. “No sign of Dee, Cam, or one of the twins.”

“Oh, right.” Joan looked over at Patton from where they’d handed the injured off to a nurse. “Thomas sent us a message. They found Roman in a labor slave caravan.”

“Ro…” Patton frowned. “Isn’t he one of the twins? Green?”

“I guess.” Joan shrugged. “He’s got green eyes, at least. But Thomas knows what he’s talking about. The guy they have says Remus is his brother, so we only need to find him now.”

“No news on Dee or Cam, though?” Patton asked as casually as he could. Joan put a hand on his shoulder, shaking his head.

“We’ll find them. We’re so close to ending this, Patton. A few more signatures, one more governor, and another province will be cleared.”

“I know.” Patton sighed. “And it’s really good they found one of the twins. It's not often we find someone we specifically wanted. Not alive, anyway.” he felt sick saying that, but it was true.

“You’re right.” Joan smiled. “Go get clean, get some rest. I’ll let you know how the newbie you brought in does tomorrow morning.”

“I don’t need rest.” Patton protested, folding his arms. “I’m gonna be with that kiddo when they wake up, no matter what you say!”

“Patt-”

“No matter what!” Patton cried dramatically. Joan rolled their eyes.

“Alright, but go get clean. You have blood all over you.”

“Oh yeah.” Patton glanced at his clothes, blushing sheepishly. “Okay. I’ll be down soon.”

“Sure.” Joan shrugged. “I’ll tell Thomas you said hi, yeah?” Patton nodded, smiling fondly as he made his way up to the washroom. Before Thomas found him, he’d had no idea there was even a rebellion against the slave culture. But now, he was helping to end it and hopefully find his brother, while trying his best to reunite others.

The more he pondered it, the happier he was to learn that they’d found Roman. Not only that, but it was the twin that Virgil hadn’t known previously - so he would at least know his brother was alive a year ago. Sure, that didn’t mean much, but Patton would love to know Dee was alive. 

He didn’t, but he hoped it was true.

Patton cleaned quickly, then made his way down to the kitchen where Joan was sitting with a mug of coffee.

“Hey, Patt.” they nodded. “Feeling better?” 

“Sure am!” Patton smiled brightly. “How’s that kiddo doing?”

“Hasn’t woken up yet, but we’ve gotten that leg wound patched up.” Joan nodded toward the infirmary, where a few injured slaves were asleep on their respective beds. “Want some coffee, if you’re insisting on staying up till they come to?”

“Don’t mind if I do!” Patton winked playfully, taking his favorite mug from the cupboard and setting it on the counter. The coffee machine whirred to life, steam puffing up as it powered the dispenser. “What else did Thomas tell you about the twin - Roman? Why was he in a labor slave caravan?” Patton wondered, sitting down across from them.

“Apparently he’s a troublemaker,” Joan shrugged. “Ended up as a labor slave - not treated very well, either. It’s weird how much stock people put into eye color until it doesn’t work out for them.”

“Yeah.” Patton sighed, shoulders falling. No, he couldn't think about that right now. He had to focus on the rebellion, finding slaves and freeing them. And if he found someone he knew, like Dee or Cam, or the other twin, all the better for him. But it wasn’t about him. It was about everyone else.

That’s what he had to focus on right now.

* * *

“It’s done.” Patton jerked awake when the door slammed open, and he brightened upon seeing Logan standing there. “The governor signed, the slave trade is being disintegrated in the southeast province as we speak.”

“That’s amazing news.” Joan rubbed their forehead, smiling thinly. “What measures are being taken to get the slaves to a safe location?”

“The old church and army barracks are serving as a temporary place for them,” Logan walked over, shedding his coat and gloves to reveal his one metal arm. “Professionals are ensuring they’re healthy and uninjured. But I’m most worried about the black market.”

“Hm.”

“It was always very active in the southeast,” Logan added, finally seeing Patton. “Oh, apologies for waking you. I heard it was a long night.”

“It was okay.” Patton yawned. “Thomas found one of Virgil’s twin friends a few days ago, though.” Logan nodded absently, though he was obviously bothered by something. “Lo?”

“Apologies.” Logan sighed, shoulders slumping. “I just know of a few underground traders who were very open about their work in the area that was just cleared, and I’m sure they won’t release the people they’re holding. At least not all of them.”

“Oh, oh no!” Patton bit his lip, mind skating over all the different names of family members, friends, and loved ones that were swept away into the trade.

“I know that face.” Joan frowned at Logan, who stared back with a grimace. “Lo, you don’t have to-”

“Yes, I do.” Logan snapped, metal hand clenching into a fist. “We have to do everything in our power to save as many people as possible. You both know this.”

“Well yeah, but that doesn’t mean you have to pretend to be someone you’re not.” Joan sighed.

“I still have contacts in the black market.” Logan closed his eyes before turning and meeting Patton’s eyes. “And I was recently informed of an individual with heterochromia who was to be lost in the market soon, records erased, lost forever.”

Patton tensed.

“Dee.” he breathed, looking quickly over at Joan. Joan pursed their lips.

“It’s up to you, Logan.” they finally shook their head. “I just know you hate it.”

“I do.” Logan sighed heavily. “But I’d hate more the knowledge that I could have done something yet didn’t.”

“What did your contact say?” Patton asked, standing up despite himself. He needed to focus on the big picture, not just himself. “What about th- is it really Dee?”

“I’m unsure.” Logan set his human hand on Patton’s shoulder and smiled sadly. “But if this mission goes as planned, every slave in the underground will be free as soon as I expose them.”

“We need to act fast.” Joan decided. “Before they get all their hostages into a different province.” Logan nodded, stepping back. “Thanks for the update, and take care of yourself.”

“I always do.” Logan chuckled, taking his coat again and shouldering it on. “You two as well, understand?” he met Patton’s eyes and smiled again, and Patton managed to return it. “I’ll get in contact with you as soon as possible.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I won't have a lot of chapters without Roman or Remus being the main but I needed to have these two scenes for PLOT reasons! 
> 
> You'll find out more about our boi Remus next chapter! Buckle up, cuz it's a rough one....  
> Love you all!  
> -Coby


	6. Remus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I haven't updated lmaooo this one is never gonna have a consistent schedule RIP
> 
> Warnings: non-consensual touching, slavery, dehumanization, rape mentions, selling a person, food mentions, etc.

“You really should eat something.” Remus ignored the voice, staring at the wall in determination. Dee sighed. “You’re going to starve to death.”

“Good.”

“Just…ugh. Do you really think you’ll be able to get out of here if you’re dead?” Dee hissed, grabbing Remus’s shoulder and yanking him around. Remus yelped, staring at him. What was he talking about? There was no way out except death.

“You’re crazy.” Remus shoved Dee away, shuffling back to sit against the wall. 

“Yeah, and I’m fed up with this shit.” Dee shrugged. “I’ve got a brother to find, and I’m not letting a perv like this guy stop me.”

Remus froze, narrowing his eyes at the other slave. 

“You realize the chance of finding your brother is zero, right?” he muttered dejectedly, hugging his knees. Dee scowled.

“Then I’ll die trying. He’s a softie and he needs me. Of course you don’t understand, you don’t even remember your own name.”

Remus winced, biting his lip. Dee sighed.

“Sorry, sorry. But I… I think you could get out of here if you tried. You just aren’t trying, and I don’t understand it.”

“There’s no point,” Remus said. “I’ve tried - I’ve tried for as long as I can remember to get out of these places. And what’d it get me? Enough knocks on the head that I can’t remember my past! I don’t want to know what they’d do to us if we tried to get away.”

“That’s why we aren’t gonna get caught.” Dee rolled his eyes. “Obviously.”

Remus looked up at him, curious.

“You’re stubborn.” 

“So are you. You’re dedicated to death, what’s with that?” Dee sighed, shaking his head. “I’d hate it if I didn’t at least try to… keep you alive. Alright?”

“Fine.” Remus lunged forward, snatching the bowl from Dee’s hands. Dee stared at him, mismatched eyes wide in surprise. “But only if you talk to me.”

“Uhm, yeah, that’s what I’ve been trying to do for over a week.” Dee rolled his eyes, getting more comfortable next to Remus. “Talk about what?”

“Your brother.” Remus avoided his gaze, heart pounding. “What d’you remember about him?”  
“Oh.” Dee hummed. “Well, we lost each other when I was like… eight? He’s got brown eyes, so he’s probably a labor slave.”

“Oh.” Remus tried to mask his disappointment and looked away. He’d stupidly wondered if Dee was the brother he vaguely remembered. But, Remus had green eyes. Lucky him.

“...what?” Dee scowled. 

“I…” Remus closed his eyes, putting the bowl down half-eaten. “I can remember some things.” he shook his head. “I know I had a brother… I think. But I can’t remember anything about him. How old he was, what he looked like, even his name.”

“Oh.” Dee blinked at him in surprise, then grinned. “Well, if you help me get out and find Patton, I’ll help you find your brother.”

Remus looked at him, eyes narrowed. Dee held out a hand.

“Deal?”

What could go wrong? Remus’s life already sucked.

“Deal.”

* * *

“Ah, yes, this is one of my newer pets.” the master said, pulling Remus forward by the hand. Remus stared at the floor, feeling humiliated and used all over again. “A pretty one, isn’t it? Just barely legal, too. Doesn’t look its age at all.” 

He wanted to roll his eyes, or make a sarcastic comment, or even try to run, but… he was scared. More scared than he could ever remember being. He was just so tired, and this man… this creep… didn’t seem to care about anything but making him into a good little toy. It was disgusting, and Remus couldn't help but desperately wish he was dead. He knew if he acted up, at least right now, things would be worse. He’d get less food. He’d get yet another concussion. And who the hell knows what else this guy would do?

“Mm, looks good enough to eat.” rough hands gripped onto Remus’s hips and he winced, glancing slightly toward the master, who didn’t seem to care. “How on earth didja get this for under a thousand?”

“The stupidity of traders.” the master laughed. “Didn’t know what they had, with this one. And it was easy to break, too. Take away their freedom and innocence, what else can they do?”

“Not a mark on it.” Remus tried not to shudder as hands traced over his skin - very exposed thanks to the ridiculously skimpy clothing he’d been given. “You’ll get a pretty penny for this if you can sell it before they shut us down.”

“Now, why would they do that?” the master laughed lightly, releasing Remus’s hand and leaving him in the clutches of the other man, a completely new stranger.

“That revolution shit.” the man said, sliding his hands down Remus’s thighs. Remus closed his eyes, hating himself even more than he had previously. “Shutting down slave markets and setting ‘em free. But you sell first, they can’t take your money away. A lotta folks are clearing out. But I haven’t seen any as good as this one in ages.”

“Oh? I didn’t know you were in the market for another toy, Nathan.” the master hummed, and Remus’s eyes shot open in fear when the man assaulting him pulled him closer.

“I wasn’t, not until I found a pretty little thing like this.” the man - Nathan? - growled slightly. “How much were you planning on selling it for?”

“Oh, the details still need to be planned.” the master said, and Remus dully realized that this had been the plan from the start. Ever since Remus had been summoned to stand in the masters' office, he’d intended to sell Remus to someone else. Shit, he needed to find a way to tell Dee what was going on. “One and a half thousand, at the very least. It's worth quite a lot.”

“Double that,” Nathan said abruptly, grinding into Remus harshly. Remus couldn't help but whimper slightly, but the man just chuckled in his ear. “Three thousand. Today. No paper trail. I’ll get it so far in the underground no one will ever manage to find it again.”

“You have the money with you, I hope?” the master asked cooly. “I won’t be relinquishing such a valuable prize without the full amount.”

“Of course I do.” Nathan scoffed, holding Remus against his chest with one arm while fishing a pouch of coins from his bag. “Anyone asks, I owed it to you.”

“Believable.” the master hummed, accepting the pouch and peering inside. “Very well. Anything else you need by way of transportation, ask the help. Pleasure doing business with you.”

“As always.” Nathan agreed, pulling Remus out of the office, looking at him with a hungry glint in his eyes. Remus stared at him, mind spinning. He could try to run. He could fight back, as soon as the man got him outside, he could escape. He could get out, find a way to break Dee out, and they’d be on their way.

Before he could even try to move on his own, however, Nathan had surged forward and pinned him against the wall, one hand on the back of Remus’s thigh and the other holding him there by his shoulder. Remus gasped, heart pounding.

“Ah, shoulda known he’d forced ya into silence.” the man growled, hand sliding up and pressing against the thin cloth covering Remus. “I’ll change that. You’re so pretty, aren’t ya? So pale and perfect. Like a canvas ready to paint.”

Well, that didn’t sound good.

“But first,” Nathan’s thumb suddenly jabbed into a spot on Remus’s neck, pressing so hard it hurt, and then Remus blacked out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts? Will Dee figure out what happened to Remus? Will Remus ever be seen again? Who Fucking Knows My Dudes I'm Just Winging This (just kidding there's gonna be a happy ending I promise)  
> Love you all,  
> -Coby


	7. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So remember yesterday when I said I had writers block and the updates would continue to be sporadic and shit? I hyperfocused for five hours after that and wrote thirteen more chapters... So have another update because I'm excited for y'all to read it all XD
> 
> Warnings: PTSD, nightmare mention, slavery, dehumanization, injury mentions, angst, and I think that's it for this one lol let me know if I missed anything

Roman snapped awake, scrambling at the blankets around him as he tried to sit up. Where was he? What the- what time was it? Someone grabbed his shoulder and Roman yelped, scrambling backwards and holding one arm up to protect his face.

Fuck. Shit, what was going on? 

“Roman, dude, calm down!”

“Wh- oh.” Roman blinked, finally able to make out the room he was in. It was the one in Thomas’s estate, with the clock. Virgil stood above the bed, hands hovering anxiously by his sides. “Virgil?”

“Are you okay…?” Virgil asked warily, eyes darkened with worry. “Did I hurt you? I… you were having a nightmare, and…”

“I’m fine.” Roman lied, sitting up and rubbing his eyes. He remembered now the past week or so, learning to live with Thomas and the others and not being afraid of every single breath he took being taken from him. Why had he had a nightmare now, of all times? He’d worried Virgil, and he looked like an idiot.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, don’t worry about it.” Roman waved a hand, slipping off the bed to his feet and stretching. 

“If you say so…” Virgil shrugged. “I’m glad you’re awake, though, Thomas needed to talk to us about something.”

“He does?” Roman’s eyes widened. “Why didn’t you say so? What is it? Does he know-”

“I don’t know.” Virgil laughed. “He wouldn’t tell me without you, now come on.” 

Roman nodded, following Virgil down to the kitchen, where Thomas sat at the table with a person Roman had never seen before. Roman tensed, glancing at Virgil and stepping slightly behind him. 

He knew… he  _ knew _ he could trust them. But he still wasn’t exactly comfortable around most people he hadn’t met. 

“Ah, there you are.” Thomas smiled, gesturing for them to sit down. Virgil nodded, elbowing Roman playfully as they made their way to the table. Roman did the same, eyeing the stranger suspiciously.

“When did Joan get here?” Virgil asked, meeting Roman’s gaze with a supportive grin. Roman’s eyes widened and he looked back at the stranger - Joan - in a new light. This was Thomas’s friend in another province, who was helping free slaves.

“Late, or early,” Joan said, waving a hand. “Doesn’t matter. We need to talk.”

“Nothing bad,” Thomas added, easing Roman’s nerves only slightly. “Just some developments.”

“What kind of developments?” Roman asked softly, heart sinking. Did they find something out? Was Remus dead? Oh, god… please don’t let Remus be dead…

“Slavery was declared illegal in the southeast province a few days ago.”

Roman blinked, trying to put together what Joan had said. Both Virgil and Thomas seemed delighted by the news. Southeast province… that was an important place, Roman was sure. He wasn’t good with geography…

“That’s one of the biggest of the six provinces.” Virgil supplied after a moment, smirking over at him. “And it had one of the biggest slave populations, seeing as Southwest and North and them were the last three to allow slavery.”

“And… we’re North…” Roman clarified, tracing out a vague outline of the country on the table. “So now only two…?”

“Yes, but more importantly…” Joan hesitated, tilting their head back and forth. “The southeast province was best known for its market of unique slaves. Green-eyed, birthmarked, etc.”

“Oh.” Roman frowned for a moment, hesitantly connecting the dots. Joan was saying Remus might have been there… but if they found Remus they’d have told him that. Right? “Do… are you… did you find him?” He looked hopefully up at the others, and Joan shook their head.

“Not yet… but it’s a work in progress trying to make sure everything went as planned. We know there’s already an illegal black market, but we have people there ready to shut it down as soon as we can, getting as many people out as we can.”

“Okay…” Roman frowned, biting absently at one of the lumpy scars on his lip. “So what did you need to talk to us about…?” It's not like he only cared about Remus - but promising himself he’d find his brother was the only reason Roman had lived this long. 

“Do you want to help us look?” Joan asked, glancing at Thomas for a moment before looking back at him and Virgil. Roman’s eyes widened. “I know you’ve both been restless, wanting to do more. We’re working with the government in Southeast, you’ll be under their protection if you agree to help us, and you’ll be able to get to Remus much faster in the event we find him.”

“Yes,” Roman spoke as soon as it was clear that Joan had finished. “I’ll do it. I’ll do whatever it takes to find Remus - and I’m not against helping everyone I can in the process.”

“You’re sure?” Thomas checked, looking worried. “You only got out two weeks ago, Roman. If you don’t feel safe doing this, You-”

“Haven’t felt safe my whole life,” Roman said dismissively. “If there’s something I can do to help find Remus, I’ll do it. End of story.”

“Virgil?” Roman looked over at his friend when Joan spoke. Virgil hesitated, tapping on the table.

“What will it… what will we have to do? I’m not going undercover as a slave or a trader if that’s what you’re thinking.”

“Of course not.” Joan shook their head. “You two will mostly be helping with relief teams, getting people to safe places, and attempting to compile records and reunite friends and family if possible.”

“Will I be able to contact Thomas?” Virgil asked. Joan nodded.

“As much as possible, yes. This province is our next goal, and he’ll be working with the government officials here, but you should be able to contact him when it's possible.”

“You don’t have to,” Roman said softly. “I won’t hold it against you - you’ve already done more for me than I’ve done in two years.”

“I want to,” Virgil said, sitting slightly taller and taking a deep breath. “Remus was my friend, in the few months I knew him, and I told you I’d help you. Being able to help like this… it’s exactly what I want.”

“Okay, but you two need to understand…” Joan spoke slowly. “Remus isn’t the top priority of our organization. I know he’s the first thing for you, but we can’t focus solely on him. There might be days we hear nothing about him, and we’ll still need you two to be on our relief team.”

“That’s… okay.” Roman hated saying it, but he knew Joan was right. “I want to help people, too. I just…”

“I know, I get it.” Joan smiled. “We have a lot of people looking for lost family members, and friends, I just wanted to make sure you knew what has to happen.”

“It makes the most sense.” Roman sighed, rubbing his eyes. He glanced at Virgil, who stared back with a determined look in his eyes. “If we have to free every single slave in the country before we find him, I’ll do it.” Virgil grinned, and they both turned back to Joan.

“When do we leave?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts? I know these chapters are shorter than most of my works, but that's just how it happened with the POV breaks and worldbuilding... lol  
> This was originally a worldbuilding experiment and I got attached to the characters and plot so that's why I even posted it I'm a MESS  
> Love you all,  
> -Coby


	8. Janus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Most of the chapters are in Roman or Remus's POV (third person limited technically) but this one needed to be in Janus's! After this, it's gonna be a while before there's one that isn't one of the main two's. Lol.
> 
> Warnings: Non-consensual touching/kissing, selling people, dehumanization, slavery, injury mentions, angst, and some Fluff! (wow, I can write fluff??? Who fuckin knew, right?)

Remus was gone. The Province was in uproar. Janus was completely and utterly fucked. Had someone found out they planned to escape and sold Remus accordingly? Or was something else causing them to sell all their slaves? He had no idea, and he wasn’t looking forward to finding out. 

“Ah, there you are my dear.” Janus made a face at the ‘masters’ tone, forcing himself not to punch the bastard in the face. “Dee, that’s what you call yourself now, isn’t it?”

Fuck, how the fuck did this guy know that? Janus never spoke around him, ever! Someone snitched, or they’d heard him talk to Remus somehow. But that didn’t make any sense. 

“Well, I’m afraid it’s time for us to part.” Janus rolled his eyes, gagging slightly when a kiss was pressed to his mouth. “Your records will be erased, and you’ll be sold to someone in the Southwest province. Or are you too stupid to understand what that means?”

Janus pressed his mouth into a thin line, staring at the wall over the man’s shoulder. Right, everyone assumed he was an idiot because he refused to talk to them. That’s what he counted on, right? But this man knew he spoke - he knew he’d told Remus to call him Dee. Nothing made sense. 

“Not to worry, you’ll fetch a high price in any market.” the man promised, gripping Janus’s chin and forcing eye contact. Janus stared blankly up at him, refusing to show any emotion. “Your friend gave me nearly as much as you will, actually.” 

That fucker. He’d known, somehow. Janus was going to murder this man if he kept talking.

“Ah, there it is. That spark.” The man sneered face inches from Janus’s. “I do wonder why you hide it, many people like the feisty ones.”

He was trying to get Janus to lash out. Probably because they had an audience - Janus thought as two men walked into the room. They must be incredibly rich, one of them had an expertly made metal arm. Only the highest members of society could get prosthetics that well made. 

“Is this the one?” the man asked, voice tight and cold. The ‘master’ let go of Janus’s chin, forcing him to turn and fully face the buyers. 

“Heterochromia, one green, and one brown. Broken in by yours truly, it’s only seen a handful of customers since.”

“This is the last of yours, isn’t it?” the buyer with both arms intact asked, lifting his head to meet Janus’s eyes. Janus scowled slightly. What was going on…

“I’m afraid so, with those new laws in place I need to get rid of them.” the ‘master’ patted Janus’s shoulder, sliding a hand down his back. Janus held back an expression of anger, knowing it would only end badly. 

“The agreed-upon price was four thousand, was it not?” the second man stepped forward, pulling out a pouch from his coat. Janus stumbled when the ‘master’ pushed him forward, into the waiting hands of the man with a metal arm. 

“We can finish this up, why doesn’t my associate bring the merchandise down to our wagon?” 

“Well…” Janus caught a flash of nervous suspicion on his previous ‘owners’ face, but the man seemed to spot the pistol in the buyer's belt and changed his mind. “Yes, that seems alright. Pleasure doing business with you.”

Janus was pulled from the room faster than he’d expected, his shoulders held tightly by one metal hand and one made of meat and bone. He wondered idly if he could fight the man easier due to his prosthetic, but never got the chance.

“My name is Logan Attwood.” the man whispered in his ear, still speedwalking them down toward the exit. “Your province passed a law freeing you two weeks ago, that man is currently being detained by my partner for refusing to comply.”

“Wh-” Janus blinked rapidly, not quite comprehending what the man was saying. No… that made sense. That was why they were selling all of their slaves - to try and escape the law while still making a profit. 

“I’m here to escort you to a safe house, where a relief team has more suitable clothing for you and will get you ready to start your life anew.” Logan continued, guiding Janus into the front of a wagon, draping a cloak over him for the time being. Janus appreciated that, but his mind was still reeling.

“I-I don’t…”

“This must come as a shock,” Logan said, getting in and clucking at the horses. “I assure you it is no prank. My organization works to free and reunite slaves with friends and loved ones.”

Oh. Janus’s heart sank. Logan had been too late to get Remus… who undoubtedly needed this more. He needed his memories, his brother, he needed safety. Janus could handle himself, but…

“Are you injured or ill at all?” Logan asked, not seeming to notice Janus’s predicament. Janus shook his head. “Do you recall your given name or one that others may recognize you by?”

“Oh.” Janus blinked rapidly. “My… my given name is Janus.” Logan’s human hand tightened on the reigns. “But those who care to know me to call me Dee.”

“Change of plans.” Logan turned the horses onto a road that led away from town. Janus frowned uneasily. “I’ll be taking you directly to a location for those searching for family. Your brother has been looking for you.”

* * *

“We’re almost there,” Logan said, pointing to a lone farmhouse, lit by a purple-tinted lantern. “This safe house is also for slaves wounded and abandoned on the battlefield, but the fighting moved out of the province recently after the laws were passed.”

“Wh-” Janus’s throat clenched. “He… they sent him to-”

“Ah, apologies.” Logan shook his head. “Patton has been working here for the past year and a half, locating those in need of help. He was not sent to fight.”

“Oh, thank god…” Janus’s shoulders fell in relief, and his heart pounded furiously as Logan pulled to a stop outside the house.

“Wait a moment to climb down, I do not want you to get a splinter,” Logan warned. Janus nodded, reluctantly accepting the fact that his current clothing wasn’t ideal for getting on and off wagons. Logan walked around and helped him down, readjusting the cloak around him to afford a bit more coverage.

Janus followed him up to the door, where Logan knocked twice before opening it.

The room was bustling with activity, people talking about a new shipment of something, and two young men reading a book on the couch, and Janus shrunk back at the noise at first.

“Logan!?” the familiar voice snapped Janus out of it, though, and he shoved past his rescuer to see a familiar face. Older, yes, but oh so familiar. 

“Oh my god.” Patton dropped the plate of cookies he was holding and surged forward, meeting Janus halfway to embrace him. “Dee… Janus, Dee… you’re back. Oh my god, he found you…”

“I’m dreaming,” Janus mumbled, burying his face in his brother's hair. “I… I was so scared…”

Finding Patton had been his only goal for years. It was what kept him from giving up. Heck, it had been what helped Remus open up to him - shit. Remus… Janus stepped back, wiping tears from Patton’s face.

“D- Janus?” Patton frowned worriedly.

“I made a promise I couldn't keep,” Janus said softly, guilt gnawing at his stomach. The elation he felt… Remus deserved to feel it too. “We aren’t done, Patton. Not until we find everyone.”

“I know.” Patton nodded softly. “But tonight… tonight we can celebrate. You need to rest, and… and we can talk.” Janus nodded, reluctantly accepting that his brother was right. “Come on upstairs, let’s get you some new clothes.”

Janus followed, glancing back once to Logan, who simply smiled. A pair of dark green eyes caught his and Janus did a double-take - but no. That wasn’t Remus, Remus was taller and thinner than that.

He only saw the boy for a moment, blocked slightly by his reading companion, so it was probably nothing… But the look in his eyes had seemed very familiar.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all are gonna kill me...
> 
> Tell me what you think! <3
> 
> Love you all,  
> -Coby


	9. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Y'all.... get ready
> 
> Warnings: slavery, selling people, dehumanization, mentions of rape/non-con, yelling, food mentions, angst, feeling hopeless

A few moments of silence followed after Patton and Dee - or Janus? - went up the stairs. Roman stared after them, confused by the shocked look on Dee’s face when they made brief eye contact. He probably wasn’t used to seeing a green-eyed person with so many scars. 

“I can’t believe it.” Virgil finally murmured, as the conversation slowly started up again with Joan and a few others pulling Logan the rest of the way inside. “They found each other.”

“Yeah.” Roman sighed, forcing the jealousy back. “I’m glad.”

“Hey, none of that.” Virgil scolded. “We’ll find him, remember? It was luck that got Dee to us so fast. Logan’s one of the undercover members Joan was talking about - he got a tip about someone with heterochromia and went for it.”

“Hetero-what?”

“Two different eye colors.” Virgil chuckled. Roman pouted.

“I’m not stupid, I just-”

“Hey, I’d never call you stupid.” Virgil elbowed him. “I don’t even know how to read, remember?”

“Not yet,” Roman said, looking down at the book between them. “So he’s got two eye colors?”

“Yeah,” Virgil stretched and nodded. “One green, one brown. By the looks of it, he was a ‘unique’ slave. Joan mentioned it back at Thomas’s place, remember?”

“I wasn’t paying too much attention.” Roman chuckled, face warming slightly. “I’m glad they got reunited.”

“Hey,” Virgil grinned over at him. “I know for a fact that as soon as you and Remus find each other, you’ll both refuse to let the other out of your sight for weeks.”

“Yeah, I-”

“Hey, Roman, meet Logan!” Joan called, drawing Roman’s attention away from his friend. He glanced at Virgil, who nodded with a smile, before getting up and crossing to the table where the others were sitting.

“Um, hi?”

“I’m Logan Attwood.” Logan smiled, adjusting his glasses with a metal hand. Roman tried not to stare, but he’d never really seen good prosthetics like that before. “I have a web of contacts through all the black markets… I’m hoping to assist in you finding your twin.”

“Wh- you…” Roman glanced at Joan, confused. “I…”

“I said that all of our resources can’t be focused on him.” Joan grinned. “Logan isn’t all our resources, and he prefers to focus on one thing at a time.”

“I do what I can along the way, but yes.” Logan nodded. “I’ve heard about Remus from Virgil, but I’d like to-”

“What did you just say?” conversation fell silent once again and Roman turned to look at the bottom of the stairs, where Patton and his brother had reappeared, Janus now wearing simple clothing like the rest of them.

“You should be resting.” Logan frowned, going to stand up. Janus held out a hand. 

“No, don’t move. Say it again.”

“I’d like to-”

“No.” Janus sighed, shaking his head. “The name. Remus.”

Roman’s eyes widened and he met Dee’s eyes, seeing that flash of confusion and recognition once again. A flash of emotion seemed to go across Dee’s face before he spoke again.

“You’re his brother, aren’t you?”

* * *

“Everyone needs to breathe,” Joan said gently, passing the last cup of coffee to Virgil as they sat around the table. 

Everyone but a few had dispersed, leaving Logan, Virgil, Roman, Janus, and Patton to talk about what they’d discovered. Joan insisting on staying, worried things may get out of hand. Which was certainly fair. 

“You know my brother,” Roman said, staring intently at Dee. “When? Where? Tell me everything, and-”

“I’m not… a hundred percent positive…” Dee said with a grimace. “I don’t… I don’t want to make you excited or get your hopes up or… I mean… he barely remembered his own name, so-”

“WHAT?” Roman shot to his feet, hands curling into fists on the table. Janus winced.

“Ro, sit down.” Virgil pulled him back into the chair. “Just hear him out… I guess.”

“But-”

“The fact that someone here interacted with this person - who could be your brother - less than two weeks ago, is incredible.” Virgil pointed out. Roman sighed, burying his head in his hands. “Dee… please explain.”

“About a month ago, they brought a kid into the place they held us,” Janus muttered. “He was barely legal, which pissed me off. He refused to eat, to talk to anyone, it was like he wanted to die.”

Roman swallowed the lump in his throat, heart plummeting.

“He only talked to me to tell me to leave him alone, until I mentioned escaping and finding Patton.” Janus nodded to said person. “But I didn’t mention names. As soon as I said I had a brother I was looking for, he was open to eating and listening to what I had to say.”

“Ohh.” Patton’s face fell, and Roman felt sick.

“Before that, he’d insisted he had no memories whatsoever of before he was around nineteen years old.” Janus shrugged uncomfortably. “But when I mentioned that, he said he knew a few things. He knew his name, and he knew he had a brother. He couldn't recall anything about him, or… really at all, but he knew he was looking for his brother.”

“What was the last you saw of him?” Logan asked, drawing Roman’s attention over to him.

“About a week ago, they started getting rid of all the slaves they had,” Janus spoke to the table, not meeting anyone's eyes. “So they could escape the law but still get a profit. One day, Remus and I were making plans to try and escape, and the next he was just gone. I don’t know… where he is.”

“Damnit.” Roman buried his head in his hands, trying to force himself not to cry. They’d been so close… so goddamn close. He barely even understood the politics of the situation, but he knew a week ago the laws had already been passed. His brother should be free.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault.” Roman snapped, rubbing his eyes. “God, we all know you couldn't have helped.”

“...I suppose.” Dee shrugged. 

“I don’t understand why he didn’t remember anything.” Virgil murmured, staring down at his coffee. “When I saw him last… he remembered everything about you, Roman. It was kinda creepy.”

“Concussions,” Dee said softly. “Something green-eyed slaves get often. Injuries that don’t change how you look. Way too many in a short time.”

“Oh my god.” Roman’s voice broke, and he buried his face in his arms, trying to hold back the sobs that shook his frame.

His brother might not remember him. The thought echoed in Roman’s head, and he felt lost and hopeless all over again. 

What if, after all this time, they found Remus and it was too late?

That would be worse than never finding him at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not even gonna apologize. I'll save the apologies for after you hear what's going on with Remus...
> 
> Love you all!  
> -Coby


	10. Remus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's... a bit different >:) It takes place over the span of a longer amount of time than most of the other chapters do, for plot reasons lol.
> 
> Warnings: Rape/non-con, self-hatred, suicidal ideation, slavery, dehumanization, dissociation, PTSD, sickness, vomit, and I think that's it? Tell me if I missed something...

Remus wanted to die. The thought made him hate himself more than ever, but it was true. He gave up. There was no use trying to do anything but what these people wanted him to do. He didn’t know how long it had been since he’d been sold to them, he didn’t know if Dee had escaped or been sold or been rescued based on what he’d heard the men say in that office.

They’d shut down slave markets. Remus wasn’t even supposed to be here anymore - he was supposed to be free and looking for… someone. Ugh, who was he supposed to be looking for…? He wasn’t sure. He knew it was important, though. And Dee… had promised to help. Dee was looking for the same person. No… Dee was looking for the same  _ kind _ of person.

But it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered. Remus was going to die here, someday. He’d be used and used and used until he was dead, and then they’d throw his body out like a piece of trash. That’s what he was, wasn’t he? Trash. Garbage. Worthless.

He wasn’t worth anything but what people would pay to rape him. And oh, people paid. Remus had lost count of how many times he’d been taken advantage of here, all the while being told that he was a lousy piece of shit.

Well, they’d convinced him. And Remus wanted to die.

“What’s the long face for, pet?” Remus ignored the person at the door, even when they stepped inside and closed it behind them. He knew this person… he was sure he did. He hated them. “Aren’t you happy to see me?”

Remus glanced up for just a moment, feeling sicker than ever. Oh, right. It was the man who’d brought him here. Remus didn’t care enough to remember his name like he had Dee’s.

“Now, that’s not how I trained you.” the man grabbed his wrist, yanking Remus forward onto his hands and knees. “Staying quiet won’t do you any good, will it?”

“No, master,” Remus said numbly, hating himself for every second he let this happen to him. He was so pathetic - what happened to escaping? Oh, right, reality happened. Reality sucked. 

“Well, then aren’t you happy to see me?” the man crouched in front of him, pulling Remus’s chin up to meet his eyes. 

“Yes, master.”

“Hm, I thought so, pet.” Remus waited for the inevitable blow to his head, or anything really, except what happened next. “On your feet. Now.” 

Remus stood, slowly so he didn’t lose his balance - but he felt oh so dizzy… and cold, and sick, and maybe he was sick… he felt like that was bad. But maybe it’d kill him, and he’d get to die, so maybe it was good after all.

“Have you ever been west, pet? To the coast?” the man was asking now, securing a collar around Remus’s neck. 

“No, master.”

In all reality, Remus had no idea where he’d been in his life. Everything was foggy, except for memories he forced himself to visit often. Dee, mostly, promising they’d escape.

“Well, I’ve got some wonderful buyers with a beach house in the Southwest province, looking for a pet just like you. Isn’t that a great coincidence?”

Remus blinked a few times, dully wondering where the man was going with this. He didn’t realize he’d be sold again... but he was also stupid and useless so what did he know?

“Now, I trust you’ll behave well for us while we talk over the details, won’t you pet?” Remus stumbled when the man pulled on the leash attached to him, guiding him down hallways Remus barely recognized. “Let them do what they will, won’t you? After all, they’ll be your new owners before the day is out.”

“Yes, master.”

Remus felt really, really sick.

* * *

Remus didn’t know where he was. Or… what was he doing again? His body felt like rocks, weighing him down to the floor that felt strangely comfortable. Ugh, he wanted to die. Maybe he was dead, that’d be nice.

No… Remus was sure being dead wouldn’t hurt this much. He must be somewhere else. 

Foggy voices broke through his consciousness, and he felt a hand running through his hair, while another hand traveled elsewhere.

Oh. Right. He wasn’t dead, so he was instead cursed to be whatever these sickos wanted him to be. God, he hated himself. 

Everything was numb… his mind, his body, his realization of what someone was doing to him this very moment, but he was tired. And he felt sick. And he wasn’t worth anything anyway, so he really didn’t care what they did. 

Hazy thoughts drifted through Remus’s mind, flashes of things he nearly remembered. A farmhouse, or… another child's laugh… grass and the sky and unending freedom.

Huh, maybe he was dying. He didn’t remember ever being free from this hell one called existence, so maybe he was seeing heaven.

Ripping pain pulled him from the vision, though, and Remus let out a strangled cry as his eyes fluttered open. 

He dully registered the agony in his stomach and chest, as well as the scent of vomit, as he watched two pairs of feet walk out and close the door behind them.

He was sick. 

Nobody wanted a sick plaything.

Maybe they’d kill him, and he’d finally be free.

* * *

No such luck.

The next time Remus woke, he was on a bed. A very comfortable bed, with a wet cloth across his forehead. 

What the…

Remus sat up, only for his head to pound angrily, like knives stabbing into his skull.

Where was he…?

“Lay down, pet.” a gentle hand gripped Remus’s shoulder and he turned, blinking a few times at the person standing there. “You’re ill, you need to rest.”

“Wh-”

“Now, now. You’ll be alright.” a hand went through his hair again, and Remus relaxed despite everything in his mind telling him to run. “None of that, pet. Lay down and be a good boy, won’t you?”

Remus slowly lay back down, staring blearily up at the ceiling.

Nothing made sense… he felt like shit. He’d think he was in heaven… but they still called him ‘pet’.

“M I… dead?” Remus slurred, turning to the person sitting at his bedside.

“Go back to sleep, pet. You’ll be alright.”

Maybe he was dead, but even in the afterlife, he wasn’t worth shit. That’d make sense, Remus figured as he drifted back into the darkness. Maybe in every universe, Remus was destined to be the lowest of the low. 

God, he hated himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> .... if you hate me I'll fully understand lmaoo even I don't like me sometimes.  
> I've also been learning interesting things about my own mental health that mayyyy explain why I like writing dark fics so much... but enough about me!
> 
> Love you all,  
> -Coby


	11. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey do you guys want some more angst?  
> Here's some more angst
> 
> Warnings: PTSD, minor self-harm, mentions of mutilation, injuries, blood, angst, and I think that's it for this one.
> 
> Enjoy!

Roman didn’t know what to do. It had been over a month since Janus was rescued, with the information on Remus, but they hadn’t found a thing. The southeast province was thriving again, with illegal slave traders mostly behind bars, but they hadn’t found anything about Remus when they collapsed the black market. There were no records, there wasn’t anything. For all he knew, Remus could be dead by now.

He tried not to focus on it when he could. He focused on helping with other things. Reuniting parents and children, friends, family, etc. He’d been teaching Virgil to read, and he was doing so much better. Heck, he’d been helping build houses for the new communities of freed individuals popping up near the borders, soon to be the seventh and eighth provinces. 

But when Logan would return for a meeting, or even just to deliver a recovered soul from the black market, he had to think about it. He knew it might be years before he found Remus again, but he’d been so close. It hurt, it hurt so much, knowing how close he’d been to finding him.

“Roman…” Roman looked up when Virgil sat next to him, legs dangling off the porch. “I’m sorry.”

“About what?” Roman asked softly, biting one of the scars on his lip, even though he’d been scolded already for reopening one.

“We’ll find him.” Virgil insisted, gripping Roman’s hand tightly. “I promise, we’ll find him.”

“Yeah.” Roman looked away, staring at the horizon. “Just not here. Not in Southeast.”

“...I know.” Virgil sighed, hanging his head. “He’s gone. Someplace else.”

“We… I was so close.” Roman whispered brokenly, punching the porch below him. “Two weeks, Virgil. We missed by… by two weeks.”

“Logan’s headed to Southwest,” Virgil said. Roman turned to look at him, surprised. “He heard intel saying that a lot of black markets sold there, just before the raid. It’s mostly rich people with big houses, on the coast.”

“And farms.” Roman shook his head. “Not that they’d sell a green-eyed slave there.”

“Oh yeah.” Virgil frowned thoughtfully. “You grew up in the Southwest, didn’t you?”

“Right near the border.” Roman shrugged. “And I never left the farm until we got sold, anyway.” Virgil nodded, hugging Roman gently with one arm. “Even if he was in Southwest, and somewhere we’d been… he wouldn’t know, would he?”

“Ro…”

“He couldn't even remember me,” Roman said, swallowing thickly. “I… what will I do if we find him and…”

“It’ll be okay,” Virgil said softly. “Dee said he remembered having a brother. That’s something.”

“But what if… what if it gets worse?” Roman wondered miserably. “He’s not… he’s not strong, Vee. He could get sick, or get more concussions, or… or…”

“Hey.” Virgil scowled, shaking his head. “Remus is strong. He might not have the best health, but he’s strong. He won’t give up, as long as he remembers something. I know that much about him to promise you that.”

“...yeah.” Roman’s shoulders fell and he looked down at his feet. “Sorry.”

“Nah,” Virgil hugged him again, a bit tighter this time. “I understand, Ro. I never had siblings, but if my dad was still alive… I’d search the world for him.”

“Remus doesn’t deserve this,” Roman said, blinking back tears. “No one does, but Remus never hurt anyone. He’s… He doesn’t deserve this.”

“Roman, we’ll find him.” Virgil pulled Roman around to look at him, and Roman nodded halfheartedly. “You can’t give up, meathead. What happened to you freeing every slave in the country to find him?”

Roman bit down on the scar a bit harder, knowing Virgil was right. 

“Roman, don’t do that,” Virgil said gently. “You’re human. It’s okay to be upset.”

Roman ignored him, biting down until he tasted blood.

“Yeah.” He finally nodded, wiping tears away. “You’re right… we’ll find him.”

* * *

“You can’t keep doing this,” Patton said, inspecting the reopened wound on Roman’s lip. Roman sighed softly. “I mean it, Ro. The scars will only get worse.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Roman mumbled around Patton’s gentle fingers. 

“It’s not too bad this time, but please try not to open it again.” Patton pulled his hands back, wiping them on a cloth. “I don’t want to give you stitches a third time.”

“Sorry.” Roman sighed, gently prodding the wound with his tongue. It was done bleeding, and he was glad Patton hadn’t had to stitch it up again. “I’ll do better.”

“If you’re done,” Virgil spoke from the doorway to the kitchen. “Thomas and Joan wanted to talk to us. It sounded important.”

“Let’s go.” Roman stood up, pausing just for a moment to thank Patton for his help before going up the stairs with Virgil to the meeting room. Thomas and Joan were engaged in conversation with Logan when they arrived, so Roman tried to take his seat as quietly as possible.

“Ah, you’re here.” Thomas looked up, smiling sadly at the two of them. “We’ve been working on a new idea, trying to get North and Southwest to pass the laws.”

“Cool.” Roman tried to hide the biting disappointment he felt, realizing there wasn’t any news on Remus.

“As you both know, Logan is about to depart to Southwest to try and locate any news on Remus, or at least get us some information on how the market system works,” Joan said, gesturing to Logan. Roman nodded. “However, he’s not going alone this time. We want to send a diplomatic group, composed of Logan and a few others, to get a read on the political state of the area.”

“I can tell you already.” Virgil scoffed. “They’re a bunch of rich people who only care about themselves.”

“Not quite.” Roman shot back, wincing when everyone looked at him. “Just… when I was growing up in Southwest… I dunno. I was near the border, but my parents… owner… was a good person. He never wanted Remus and me to be sold, in fact, he was a lot like Thomas except he didn’t pay us in money. The only reason we left that farm is because of the plague a few years back.”

“That was one dude.” Virgil pointed out.

“He had friends,” Roman said with a shrug. “And they didn’t seem to mind the way he treated his slaves. He was like a fun grandpa, kindof. I just think there’s a possibility that more people will agree with us than not, that’s all.”

“You make a good point,” Logan hummed. “Though it has been over two years, I’m sure there are people who agree with us.”

“But the majority might not,” Virgil said. “We need to be prepared to fail.”

“That’s exactly why I want you and Roman to be part of the group that goes,” Thomas said with a smile. Roman’s eyes widened in surprise. “So, will you go?”

Roman glanced at Virgil, who met his gaze with that same determination he’d always had. 

“Yeah. We’ll go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts? Theories?   
> Ah, who am I kidding? Y'all have no idea where this is going. I hope I don't disappoint lmaoo.
> 
> Love you all,  
> -Coby


	12. Remus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is one of my favorite chapters lol I dunno why I just love it!!!
> 
> Warnings: Illness, rape/non-con mentions, death mentions, slavery, slight dehumanization, dissociation, thinking one is dead/dreaming, food mentions

“He hasn’t gotten much better.” 

Remus dully heard voices around him, but he didn’t really find it in himself to care.

“The doctor said he must have been around for that plague, three years back. Said a lot of survivors struggle with aftershocks.”

Hmm. That sounded familiar.

“Those traders knew full well he was ill, too. Doc says he’s been sick for far longer than a month - why didn’t they do something?”

“Black market. Haven’t you heard? Slaves were illegal in Southeast by the time we bought him. Unethical, most unethical.”

Remus wasn’t sure that made sense. Wasn’t it some kind of double standard to have that opinion? He might not have heard it correctly, though. He wasn’t even sure he was awake and not dreaming.

“I do know they treat slaves worse, elsewhere.” the first voice sighed. “A shame, he’s such a gentle, pretty young man. I wonder how he entered the trade, anyway.”

“Oh, who knows?” the second said. “But the doctor can only do so much for him, now. He should have gotten treatment immediately - who knows how long they let the infection fester? It’s a miracle he’s alive.”

They weren’t referring to him as an object. Remus dully rolled that realization around in his mind. No ‘it’s’ or crude remarks.

He was definitely dreaming. 

“Miracle or not, he’s our responsibility.” a gentle hand combed through Remus’s hair and he sighed. “I wonder… the plague only really affected here and Northwest. Perhaps being in the sun would be better for him.”

Hah, the sun. Remus remembered the sun. It was nice.

“Maybe if he wakes up.” The voice was sad, doubtful. “He could be lost to us already. If he wakes and improves even a little bit, we’ll take him out and get another doctor to look at him.”

“I suppose… you’re right.” the hand left Remus’s hair and he wanted to whine and pull it back, but couldn't seem to control his body. “It's all we can do for now.”

Remus was very confused.

* * *

Remus wasn’t cold. That was… weird. He’d been cold every time he woke up that he could remember. He felt more awake, too, than those times. He could feel someone gently wiping sweat from his face.

He could open his eyes.

“The fever broke.” Someone said, their face still blurry above him. “I… he should be dead, but the fever broke.”

“I’m glad you sent for me.” 

Hmm. That voice seemed… familiar.

“I know you helped with the plague farther north, but perhaps…”

“I did. I spent a few months, in fact, on the Grayson farm. You know the one, lovely old man he was. Shame, the plague took him.”

Huh. That was also familiar. Remus blinked a few times, clearing his vision enough to meet the eyes of a very surprised doctor.

“G- he’s awake.”

“What?” Remus winced as the bed jostled slightly.

“Green eyes, I see…” the doctor put a hand to Remus’s forehead. “No fever, as well. Can you sit up, boy?”

“Wh-” Remus grimaced, head swimming as he managed to follow directions.

“Why, I do believe we’ve met before.” The doctor put something against Remus’s chest, instructing him to breathe in and out. “You barely survived that illness, didn’t you child.”

“You treated him?” one of the voices Remus wasn’t sure about asked in surprise.

“Yes, I believe so. Grayson had a few families working on his farm, two little green-eyed boys, and their parents as well. Only one of them didn’t fall ill. This one managed to pull through, but the estate was divided and sold soon after.”

“I remember that. I thought the old man's will said to free them. It was an outrage. If this is one of those boys, why isn’t he free?”

“Why isn’t he indeed.” Remus grimaced at the hands still touching him, utterly confused.

What were they… they wanted him to get better? They weren’t… touching him except to steady him. That was… that was weird. He barely understood what they were talking about, but he knew the name Grayson was familiar to him. 

“You say you purchased him from black market sellers?”

“It’s the only realistic explanation. We didn’t know Southeast had outlawed it and they said that’s where they got him. The timelines only match the black market, not any regular route.”

“I’ll have to tell Attwood about that…” the doctor gently pushed Remus back into bed, and Remus gratefully closed his eyes. “You haven’t had him do anything for you since you realized he was sick, have you?”

“Of course not.” a voice snapped. “You’re the third doctor we’ve tried, they all wanted us to give up and forget about his recovery. Honestly, the inhumane people who live here… this boy shouldn’t even be a slave.”

“No one should.” The doctor said, followed by a beat of silence. 

Remus idly wondered if he was about to witness a murder.

“You’re… you’re right.” 

“Yet you have several on your estate. Forgive me, but perhaps you should consider where you stand on this.”

“I-”

“Until then,” a gentle hand pulled Remus’s mouth open and tipped a small amount of broth into his mouth. He could hardly taste it, but it was good. “You’ll need to watch his temperature. It’s been rising again these past few minutes. Keep the window open, and I’ll leave some cleansing incense for you to burn and help clear out his lungs.”

“Yes, of course.”

“I’ll be back in a few days time. I think he’ll recover, though he’ll certainly be weakened.”

Remus wasn’t sure he liked the sound of that, but he wasn’t up to doing much about it. He heard the doctor leave the room, and a cold towel was once again placed on his forehead.

“Oh, child.” a soothing voice sighed, combing a hand through his hair. “The world is cruel, isn’t it.”

That, Remus could agree on. He was confused, and the world was very, very, cruel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This isn't even close to being over
> 
> Love you all,  
> -Coby


	13. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a good one - buckle up y'all you have no idea what's about to happen.
> 
> Warnings: Death mentions, illness mentions, slavery mentions, angst, food mentions

“This is so weird,” Roman mumbled, looking around as he walked with Virgil and Logan through the town. “We came here once when I was like ten.”

“Really?” Virgil seemed surprised. “We’re way more south than you lived, though.”

“My parents' owner was a rich old farmer.” Roman shrugged. “He spent a summer down here and brought us with. Not sure why.”

“Wait.” Logan stopped, holding out his metal arm to halt the other two. Roman looked at him in surprise. “The Grayson Farm?”

“Uh… I think so.” Roman shrugged. “Not a thing anymore, right? He died of the plague and we got sold.”

“...why do you know the name of the farm?” Virgil asked. Roman frowned as he realized his friend had a point. “It was just a farm, right?”

“I should have realized earlier.” Logan murmured. “You grew up on Grayson’s farm?”

“Yeah, that’s what I just said,” Roman said, rolling his eyes. “Geez.”

“Change of plans.” Logan started walking again, this time with more purpose than before. “We’re going to see an old friend of mine, Dr. Croft.”

“Okay…” Roman followed, struggling to keep up with Logan’s fast pace. That name sounded familiar. “Care to explain?”

“Charles Grayson was not an old farmer,” Logan said, shaking his head. “He was the political leader of Southwest Province. Had he not died, slavery would be outlawed here by now.”

“Wh- but he owned slaves!” Roman pointed out, looking at Virgil in confusion. Virgil seemed just as baffled, shaking his head. “Remember that bit?”

“Slaves set to be freed collectively mere weeks after his death,” Logan said darkly. “All the paperwork, all the files and new identification cards printed out for every slave. Half of which died of the plague, the rest taken and sold by his relatives. Only a few were able to be freed.”

“Wh- that… that doesn’t make sense.” Roman stammered heart sinking. “I… we didn’t…”

Logan stopped abruptly outside of a small clinic, herbs and medicines lining the shelves in the window. 

Roman looked at him, then Virgil, before following Logan inside. His eyes widened when he saw the man inside, looking through a file of papers.

“Dr. Croft.” Logan smiled, drawing the man's attention. 

“Ah, Logan! I was hoping to hear from you, I have some-” the man cut himself off when he saw Roman staring at him. “Well, would you look at that. I remember you.”

“Wh- back off!” Virgil pushed himself in front of Roman. “We’re not-!”

“No, Vee, wait.” Roman put a hand on his friend's shoulder. “He’s a doctor - he treated my family back… back when…” Virgil’s eyes widened in surprise and Roman blinked back tears as he recalled the events. Events he’d just learned had fucked up his life entirely.

“Logan, explain.” Virgil snapped. Logan sighed, closing his eyes for a moment.

“I do not know all the details, I already told you what I know. After the scandal was discovered, all files and information were left to Dr. Croft, as Graysons will instructed. I knew if anyone could get us access to anything, it would be him.”

“I don’t…” Roman leaned gingerly on a table, rubbing his forehead. “I… god, what are you talking about? We…”

“I can get you access, all right.” Dr. Croft put down his papers, which Roman could see had his and Remus’s full names on the top of. “You and your brother were meant to inherit Charlie’s entire estate.”

* * *

Roman was probably in shock or something. He stared at the tea Dr. Croft had given him, listening idly as the man detailed more of what happened. How it happened. Why… why on earth… it had happened.

“Grayson’s friends, and his political followers,” Dr. Croft said now. “Are still a major force in Southwest's government. In fact, most people here no longer own or buy slaves. Those who do, buy from other provinces.”

“That is indeed good to know.” Logan hummed. “We’re here due to intel saying a black market route sold several freed slaves from Southeast to people here. And to check on the possibility of us getting a law passed like we did there, which seems to be higher than anticipated.”

“Us in Southwest have always felt distant from the other five.” Dr. Croft mused. “But yes, I’m glad you heard of that. I was meaning to send you a message regarding it later today, once I checked on these files.” He gestured to the ones regarding Grayson’s Farm, and Roman and Remus.

“Wait-” Virgil waved his hands for a minute, standing up. “You didn’t know we were coming.”

“No, but it’s always a pleasant surprise to see Logan once again. I recall-”

“So why did you have papers about Roman and his brother?” Virgil snapped, interrupting the sure to be lengthy anecdote. Roman frowned, realizing that Virgil had a point. Dr. Croft’s eyes widened suddenly, and he jumped to his feet.

“You don’t know.” he breathed, gathering papers and tools and putting them in his bag. “Of course you don't, I hadn’t sent the telegram yet. Goodness, I’m dim. How I ever became a doctor I’ll never know…”

“Dr. Croft?” Logan frowned, standing slowly, careful realization on his face. 

“I meant to tell you.” Dr. Croft said, shaking his head. “Remus is here, I’ve been treating him for a good week now.”

“Wh-” Roman choked on a sip of tea, letting it fall to the table and spill. “What?!”

“On your feet, then, it's a fifteen-minute walk out to where he’s been.” Roman stood up, looking at Virgil with wide eyes.

“Explain,” Virgil demanded again, though the group was already making their way out of the clinic behind Dr. Croft.

“He’s sick?” Roman grabbed the doctor's elbow desperately. “Again? Why? What happened, when-”

“A common thing, we’ve found, in plague survivors.” Dr. Croft said, not slowing his step. “It weakens the lungs, you see. And many who lived have never been the same… a good portion of them develops an illness that preys on their weakened immune system and lungs. He should be alright - I saw him just yesterday in fact and realized who he was when I saw his eyes. Very particular eyes, he has. I’ve never seen a green quite like it.”

“But he’ll be okay?”

“I believe so. It’s a miracle, but his fever broke and he woke up for a few minutes.” Dr. Croft smiled sadly at Roman. “He’ll be alright, child. You’ll see him again soon.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Get ready for a lot of angst...
> 
> Love you all,  
> -Coby


	14. Remus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> heyyy have another chapter! Also, check out the endnotes cuz I have an announcement not super related to my writing but also kindof related to my writing XD
> 
> Warnings: illness, slavery, dehumanization, dehumanizing yourself, amnesia, angst, injury/scar mention, etc.

For the first time Remus could remember, he woke up. Completely. There was no fog, no leaden bones pulling him down, he was just awake. Of course, that didn’t erase the fear and confusion and utter lack of any memories, but he was awake. And that, he was pleased about.

A person sitting at his bedside - they were slightly familiar - fed him broth and explained that he’d been sick for a few weeks - maybe longer. He still wasn’t healed, so he had to stay in bed. 

“Wh-” Remus narrowed his eyes slightly. “You’re m… you own me…?”

“Ah…” the person grimaced. “No.”

“Who does?” Remus rubbed his head and grimaced. He could only recall the fact that he’d been used by his owners. He wasn’t… a person. A pet is what he was. A plaything. “Where… where am I?”

“You’re still sick, child.” the person said softly, staring at their hands. “Don’t worry.”

“Does… does my master know?” Remus set the empty bowl he had in one hand to the side. “Why isn’t… why aren’t they here?”

“They know.” the person said slowly. “Just focus on recovering, child. It’s alright.”

“Wh- what’s going on?” Remus moved away from them, eyeing the room suspiciously. “This… it’s not right.”

“Pet - I mean- child…” Remus’s head swiveled, narrowing his eyes as the person cursed under their breath. That voice was familiar. That was the last master he remembered before the fog of illness. 

“You… you are my master.” Remus couldn't help but feel relieved. “I remember that.”

“... yes, I suppose.” Master moved the bowl to a table a few feet away. “But I want you to be well, child. Don’t worry yourself, you’ll get sick.”

“But-”

A hurried knock on the door interrupted him and Remus fell silent, obediently watching Master for any instructions.

“Stay in bed, child.” Remus nodded, not moving otherwise, as he watched the man get up and open the door. A hushed conversation followed, which Remus didn’t bother trying to eavesdrop on.

Things made sense again.

He was a pet. He was not dead, or free, he was a possession. He wasn’t worth anything, just like always. He was glad things made sense again. 

“He’s just woken up, Dr. Croft, and gotten some broth in his stomach.” master was saying as a group of four people - one of which Remus vaguely recognized - into the room.

Strangers. Remus scowled, sizing them up to try and see if he could figure out what he was meant to do. Were they here to use him? Buy him? The doctor… he was trying to make Remus healthy again. But what about the other three? 

“Remus.” one of the strangers said, voice choked with emotion. Remus looked at him, surprised at the flash of recognition he felt at hearing the person's voice. The person had green eyes like he did… and scars. So many scars. He must also be a slave. Huh. 

“He’s been very ill the past few weeks.” the doctor said, walking over to feel Remus’s head. Remus sat as still as possible, breathing when told to breathe, accepting the medicine that was offered him.

This was strange… but it still made sense. He saw a lot of strangers, and he was sure that once he was better the strangers would use him for what they wanted and leave like the others all did. 

The only confusing part was that other green-eyed slave, who was crying now. Didn’t he know playthings weren’t supposed to cry? Remus eyed him curiously, trying to figure out why he felt so strange upon seeing him.

“Remus,” the doctor gently lifted Remus’s chin. “You’re doing well, child. Your brother is here.”

What the fuck was this guy talking about?

“I…” Remus winced, pulling away from the doctor and looking where he last saw master - but he was gone. The only people there were the doctor and the strangers. “Wh-what?”

“Remus…” the other slave walked over, drying his tears. “Remus, it’s me. It’s Roman. I found you.”

“... Roman.” Remus skeptically tested out the name. He was confused. Why was this slave allowed to talk without being addressed first?

This wasn’t right. A spike of uneasiness made Remus recoil, pressing his back against the headboard. 

“I… I don’t like this,” he said softly. “Where’s… master left. Where did master go… I don’t know what to…”

“Remus, you don’t have a master.” the doctor said. Remus’s head snapped around and he stared, wide-eyed. “They freed you. You’re not a slave, or anything else, except yourself.”

* * *

“I’m dead.” Remus tried, looking suspiciously over his knees at the people sitting around him. The doctor. The strangers - Roman, the strange other slave. Or, maybe they were all angels. “I’m dead, probably. Right?”

“No, Remus.” the doctor said softly. “You aren’t dead.”

“I’m dreaming,” Remus suggested, though they’d already denied this claim several times. “I’m dreaming and that’s why you’re being nice to me.”

“You’re wide awake.” 

“...am I dead?” Remus asked, just once more to be sure.

“No.” One of the strangers sighed. Remus looked at him instead, finding his face just as familiar as Roman’s. “You’re alive, Remus. No one’s going to hurt you again, we found you and we’re going to keep you safe.”

“...you’re familiar.” Remus finally confessed, hugging his knees closer to his chest. “Have… I don’t know. You’re not one of them.” He looked back to Roman, who looked utterly devastated. “I… don’t remember.”

“That’s alright.” the doctor soothed. “You’re still recovering from your illness, and you’re safe. That’s the most important thing.”

“I…” Roman spoke and Remus snapped his attention back to the other. “I’m so sorry, Remus. I… I should have protected you. I… I should have found you, I should have done something to help you… this is all my fault, I-”

“No, it’s not, Roman!” 

“I should have done something to help!” Roman insisted.

“No one can help me,” Remus said blankly. Romans face paled and he looked over. “I’m… I’m nothing, never have been. Why… why are you so… why would you want to help me?”

“I’m your brother, Remus.” Roman’s voice broke and Remus felt a twinge of guilt. “I’m supposed to protect you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so very cruel to my bois....
> 
> In other news, I've decided to officially come out on my main social media (this included) as an OSDD - 1b system. Essentially, I have multiple personalities or (the medically correct term) Alters. That's why my posting schedule isn't super reliable, and also why I'll be writing some fics/oneshots in the future dealing with more specific trauma and personality disorders from my own experience. (it also may be why, I'm learning, that I am so good at writing traumatized characters. Just never occurred to me that I myself may be traumatized lol) I'm not here to teach you, so you can go do your own research if you would like, but all of my alters are willing to chat on our tumblr @thejurassicsystem
> 
> Love you all,  
> -Coby


	15. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who wants some angst?? Cuz that's ALLLL you're gonna get today....
> 
> Warnings: slavery mentions, possible food mentions, injury mentions, amnesia, angst

They stayed with Remus for a few days, until Dr. Croft said Remus was fit enough to travel a bit. Roman wanted to get him out of that house. Away from those people that bought him like an object. He knew he was being slightly unfair, hating them, as they’d nursed Remus back to health with Dr. Croft, but he didn’t care.

Remus still didn’t seem to believe he was free, and he hadn’t remembered anything about Roman or Virgil. Not that he’d said, anyway, but he was always staring at one of them thoughtfully.

Logan sent a telegram back to Thomas and Joan the first night, detailing the basics of what they found, and that the political state was much better than they hoped. The response, Roman hadn’t read. But he knew Logan had sent a few more, detailing plans to bring a few others - like Dee and Patton and Thomas - to Southwest to work with the governor. 

Roman still wasn’t sure what to think, about the fact he should have been free - and rich - the past two years. He had tried not to think too much about it, focusing mainly on his brother. Who didn’t seem to trust him any more than he had the first day.

“We’re going home, Remus,” Roman said, gently helping him stand on shaky legs. Remus frowned.

“I don’t…think I have one.”

“Yeah, neither did I.” Roman smiled weakly. “Turns out we own a farm, though. Dr. Croft’s been overseeing it the past couple of years while he looked for us.”

“...you’re weird,” Remus mumbled, briefly meeting Roman’s eyes before looking back at the floor.

“Thomas and Dee are gonna be at the train station,” Roman said instead of responding. Remus frowned, steps faltering slightly.

“Dee?”

“Yeah, Dee.” Roman’s heart beat faster at the recognition in his brother's voice. “And Patton, his brother.”

“Dee’s brother.” Remus scowled thoughtfully as Roman and Virgil helped him into the buggy that would take them to the train station. Logan was already inside, and Roman didn’t miss the skeptical look Remus sent his way before looking back at Roman.

“I’ll sit next to you, no worries,” Roman promised, getting in after him. This seemed to calm the worry in his brother's eyes, and Remus fell silent as he stared at the floor. Roman glanced at Virgil, who looked just as worried and unhappy as Roman felt.

Roman hadn’t ridden a train until a week ago when he and Virgil and Logan traveled here from the Southeast province. It was a weird experience, not to mention terrifying, but he wanted to get Remus someplace completely safe as soon as possible. If that meant taking a train to the closest stop to the Grayson farm, then so be it.

* * *

Surprisingly, Remus fell asleep an hour or so into the trip. He seemed to have accepted that Roman was trustworthy, as he curled against Roman’s side to do so. Roman was glad, but it still tore his heart to pieces as he realized that Remus didn’t remember him in the slightest.

“He’ll be okay,” Virgil said, though Roman wasn’t sure he believed it. “He’s Remus. He’s strong as fuck. He’ll be okay. Made it this far, didn’t he?”

“Yeah.” Roman laughed sadly, recalling what Dr. Croft had said about Remus’s health. He should be dead, but he wasn’t. He’d been sick for way too long without being treated, but he was alive. His lungs and immune system would be weaker than ever, yeah, but… he was alive. 

“Are you sure about using the estate as a base for us?” Logan asked after another hour, mostly filled with silence. Roman looked up at him, frowning.

“Of course. Just because I found Remus doesn’t mean I’m done helping you.” He scoffed. “What’d I do with that whole place to myself, anyway? You guys are welcome to stay and do whatever you need to do. I told you that a million times.”

“Nine, actually, but I appreciate the statement.” Logan chuckled. “We should be arriving soon, Thomas should have already gotten a buggy for us to take to the farm.”

“Good.” Roman sighed, looking back down at Remus. He was pale and skinny, but still Remus. No scars marring his face like Roman had. Still, Roman knew his brother was hurt beyond belief by what those people had done to him. He kept mentioning how he wanted to be dead, or how he wasn’t worth anything, and it killed Roman every time. Remus didn’t deserve this.

“Remus, we’re here.” Roman gently nudged his brother awake. “Gotta get up, meet with Thomas and Dee and Patt.”

“Hmm?” Remus slowly opened his eyes, recoiling away from Roman’s shoulder where he’d been asleep. “s-Sorry… I didn’t-”

“It’s okay.” Roman smiled sadly, helping Remus stand up. “You’ll be alright, Remus. It’s just time to get off the train.”

“Right.” Remus yawned, leaning on Roman’s shoulder again as they walked. “You’re nice. Forgot.”

“It’s okay.” Roman blinked back tears, helping him get off the train after Logan, who had already spotted the others where they waited. Dee’s eyes widened when he spotted Roman and Remus, but Remus hadn’t noticed him. He was still mostly asleep, now that Roman glanced over to check on him.

“Wh-where are we?” Remus squinted around, yawning again. 

“Train station, almost home.” 

“Oh.” Remus frowned. “I don’t… I don’t remember home.”

That was an improvement from what he’d said this morning, Roman noted. Perhaps getting him out of the house of people who bought him was helping, if only a bit. Remus stumbled, eyes wide as he finally noticed Dee and the others waiting for them.

“Wh- wait a- I know him.” Remus stammered, looking over at Roman. Roman smiled sadly. “That- it’s Dee. I know Dee.”

“Yeah, you do,” Roman said softly, heart clenching. Remus at least remembered something. Roman just wished it was him, instead of Janus.

“Dee?” Remus spoke louder - louder than Roman had heard him all week - as they approached. Janus’s face split into a relieved smile and he closed the gap, helping Remus walk on his other side. 

“Hey, Remus. Told you, we’d get out of there.”

“Hmm.” Remus held back a yawn, one hand gripping Roman’s shirt tighter. “Y’found… Patton.”

“Yeah.” Janus glanced at Roman questioningly, Roman looked away. “And you found your brother.”

“I…” Remus looked at Roman, brow furrowed as he studied Roman’s face. “I don’t remember.”

“That’s okay, Remus,” Roman said gently, offering yet another smile. “You’ll be okay.” Remus still looked skeptical, and he shook his head slightly before looking away.

“We’ll see.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will he remember? or will he just have to start anew?  
> Who fuckin knows my dude we just winging this thing alright brain trauma is complicated shit so like anything is possible really
> 
> Love you all,  
> \- Jason


	16. Remus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heyyyyy who wants more angst? Hopefully, all of you, because that's what you get.   
> Don't worry there's also fluff lmaooo just angst first.
> 
> Warnings: PTSD, rape/non-con mentions, dehumanization, feeling worthless, self deprecation/hatred, food mentions, injury mentions, slavery, angst

He remembered Dee. Vaguely. He remembered… not great things about when he’d met Dee. He also recalled that Dee had been searching for someone, and they promised to help each other find him. And, Remus had been hoping to see someone. Most of the others seemed to believe that Roman was this person, and Remus knew that made sense.

But he was terrified out of his mind, and he had no idea what was going on.

They said he was free. They had a home - a farm that tugged at all the memories Remus didn’t quite have. Dee and Patton stayed with them. Along with Roman, and Virgil who Remus couldn't quite place. Then there were the people he didn’t trust one bit, Logan and Thomas. They had money, and he was almost positive they’d bought him. He was just waiting for the other shoe to drop, really.

It had been a few days - maybe a week - since they got to this farm. People came and went, but Remus mostly stayed in bed or in the library with Roman when he felt up to it. The doctor visited regularly and kept telling him how lucky he was to be this healthy. Remus wasn’t sure.

As soon as he was healthy again, he knew someone would use him. He’d be a pet, a toy, a plaything, and he really didn’t want that. The respite had been nice, and confusing, and he didn’t want it to end. He knew he wasn’t dead or dreaming, he’d pinched himself enough times to know that by now. 

The door to the library opened and Remus tensed, knuckles turning white on the book he held.

It wasn’t Roman. He could tell when it was Roman by the way he breathed and moved. Remus slowly lifted his head, meeting Logan’s gaze. 

“Oh. Remus, hello there.”

Remus braced himself for… something… as Logan walked over and sat next to him on the couch. 

It was over. The break was over. He knew it. He should have been used long before now, anyway. 

Remus closed his book and gently set it to the side, staring at the floor and waiting for an order. Logan took in a breath, and Remus winced.

“Remus…” 

He was using Remus’s name. That was weird.

“I am not going to touch you, Remus.” 

Remus scowled, not quite understanding the command. Logan stood up, and Remus prepared to slip off the couch onto his knees - but Logan stepped a few yards away.

Remus finally looked up, staring quizzically at Logan.

“S-Sir…?”

“No, Remus,” Logan said firmly. “Call me Logan. I am not… I will never harm you or use you in any way.”

Remus’s shoulders fell and he stared at Logan, playing the sentence back in his mind a few times.

“Why?”

“You deserve to be treated well, Remus,” Logan said softly, not stepping closer. “With respect, and kindness. I would never do anything to harm you.”

“But…” Remus shook his head, staring at the floor. “I… I thought…”

“Whatever it is, you were wrong,” Logan said gently. “You are free, Remus. You do not need to fear me, or anyone else, ever again.”

Remus stayed silent, thinking over the past two weeks since he met Logan. 

He hadn’t seen any transaction go on, which most of his owners had made him watch. He hadn’t had to prove himself to Logan beforehand, which was also strange. Logan had never even… touched him at all. In any way. 

He was telling the truth.

“Remus?”

“Okay.” Remus let out a shaky breath, rubbing his eyes. “Okay. I… I don’t understand, but okay.”

“Would you like me to find Roman or Virgil for you?” Logan asked softly. Remus nodded, still staring at the ground. Logan left, and Remus pulled his legs up against his chest, hugging them tightly, as he pondered what all of this could possibly mean.

* * *

“The sun…” Remus trailed off, looking away from Roman’s face. They were sitting outside. Oh, Remus loved outside. He hadn’t been in the sun for so long… it was nice. 

“Yeah?” Roman prompted, the way he did whenever Remus forgot to finish talking.

“I missed it,” Remus said softly. “I can’t remember seeing it before now, but I missed it anyway.”

“Ah.”

Roman was his brother. Remus… Remus knew that, really. It made sense. Patton was Dee’s brother. Remus had been looking for someone like Patton, based on what he recalled telling Dee. Roman remembered him. The papers the doctor gave them said they were brothers. Remus wanted to believe it.

But he was scared.

Pathetic.

“I’m sorry.” Remus sighed, pulling his arms up to make himself fall onto the grass, instead of just sitting. Roman paused for a moment.

“Sorry about what?”

“I’m sorry I don’t remember you,” Remus said softly. “Or Virgil. Or this place. I believe you’re my brother, and that I knew Virgil… I don’t think you’re lying to me.”

“Well, that’s good.”

“I did,” Remus corrected himself. “I thought… I don’t know. I thought you were lying. Or something. But I know you aren’t.”

“What… do you remember?” Roman asked.

“I remember… mostly since I met Dee.” Remus said. “It’s kinda foggy, especially when I got sick, but I remember. That’s how I figured out you weren’t lying, cuz I talked to Dee about looking for you. I remember telling him that.”

“Oh.” 

“I want to remember you.” Remus looked over to Roman, who was staring at the sky. “And your face is familiar. But I don’t… remember. Same with Vee.”

“That’s okay,” Roman said. Remus knew it wasn’t. Roman was upset - he might start crying again soon. 

“Roman.”

“It’s not your fault.” Roman insisted. “It’s okay. Honestly, I’m glad you remember Dee. I’m glad you’re not sick anymore. I’m glad we found you.”

“You were looking for me,” Remus noted thoughtfully. “You and Virgil… and those others.”

“Thomas freed me,” Roman said. “Virgil and him were looking to help us find each other. So Thomas freed me. And I’ve been helping him since then, and he’s been helping look for you.”

“Helping him with what?”

“Closing slave markets, trading routes, getting people safe.” Roman waved a hand. “I never realized how many good people existed, Remus. Hardly anyone… only one province legally allows slaves now.”

“Huh.” Remus had no idea what Roman was talking about. It sounded vaguely familiar, but he was still confused. 

“But, yeah.” Roman laughed lightly. “I was looking for you. Have been since I lost you.”

“Wish I could say the same.” Remus frowned. “But I only remember giving up.”

“Hey.” Roman frowned at him. “It’s okay.” 

“Are you still helping Thomas?” Remus asked, sitting up abruptly and shaking grass out of his hair. 

“Yeah, actually. We’re having a meeting about the Northern Province tonight after dinner. Why?”

“I want to help too.” Remus nodded decisively, smiling over at his brother. Roman looked surprised. “Think he’ll let me?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bwap Bwap what do y'all think so far? I'm having a lot of fun with the worldbuilding bit of this story, even though I know the plot could be better. I'm having fun and that's what matters most, I think! :D
> 
> Love you all,  
> -Coby


	17. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here's another one, motherfuckers
> 
> Warnings: angst, self-deprecation, mentions of Rape/non-con, injury mentions, mental health talk, yee
> 
> Enjoy

For the past - god, nearly the past three years - Roman’s only goal was finding his brother. Finding him, and getting them both somewhere safe. 

He’d done that. Remus was in the next room over, probably asleep by now. They were safe, and apparently the heirs to this dudes estate. 

That didn’t make sense to Roman. He’d seen the paperwork. He’d insisted Dr. Croft show it to him, and had Logan explain it, before he’d considered believing it might be true. And it was. Legally, he and Remus owned the land they’d grown up on. 

What he couldn't wrap his head around was why. Why had their parents' owner left it to them? He’d owned several families - though most didn’t have children with them. He’d had siblings and relatives more fit to own such a thing.

But he’d left it to two sixteen-year-old slaves. They’d been sixteen years old - why on earth had he done that? It didn’t make sense.

Roman sighed, sitting up and looking over at Virgil - who was fast asleep in the other bed. They’d offered the bed to Remus, saying Virgil would have his own, but Remus had refused. That was fair, it just made Roman feel worse. 

He absently prodded the scars in his lips with his tongue, reminding himself not to bite them. Things were good now. They were safe. Remus was back, they were safe, and Thomas’s organization was doing more good than ever before. Heck, the seventh province had already been officially separated from the Northeast and Southeast. So many people that Roman didn’t even know were making changes - and what had Roman done?

He had no idea if he’d impacted that at all. He’d comforted hundreds of children, reunited so many families and friends, he’d built entire houses. 

So why, after everything was going so well, did he still feel like shit?

Roman quietly slid out of bed, pulling on his shoes before sneaking out of the room. He was allowed out, he knew that, but he didn’t want to wake up Virgil.

The house was the same as he’d always remembered it. It felt like home, safe. Even though he’d been a slave growing up here, he knew he’d had it better than many others. His parents had died in this house, but that didn’t bother him as much as he thought it would.

Roman walked gently through the house, finding himself on the back porch with a view of the darkened fields - overtaken with weeds after two years of his absence. 

How many nights had he spent here, playing with Remus and his parents after the work for the day was complete? And Charles Grayson - who was the only ‘master’ Roman had never been afraid of. 

Nothing made sense, it never had. It had never made sense that Roman learned to read, that he’d been well taken care of, during his childhood. Yet… so many people had known. So many people here, years ago, had accepted it. But still owned slaves. Why? Why would they live in such a double standard? 

Roman sighed, running a hand down his face. He felt like shit. 

Remus didn’t remember him.

Roman felt incredibly guilty for feeling so upset about that. He knew Remus had suffered so much - probably more than Roman had - the past three years. He had no right to want Remus to be the same as always because it wouldn’t happen. Roman wasn’t the same, so why should Remus be?

Talk about a double standard.

“What are you doing out here?”

Roman jumped, whirling around with one hand grabbing the railing tightly. Dee took a step back, holding up his hands.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.”

“Oh… right.” Roman took a few moments to breathe, reminding himself continually that Dee wasn’t a threat. He was safe. He’d been safe for weeks now.

“Can’t sleep?” Dee asked, moving cautiously to stand by the railing next to Roman. Roman shrugged, looking at his hands. “Lost in thought?”

“I guess.” Roman sighed. “Why are you awake?”

“Same as you.” Janus hummed, eyes skating over the landscape in the moonlight, then looking back at Roman. “How long ago did Thomas find you?”

“Hm?” Roman looked up and frowned, mentally counting the months back. “Uh… a few months. Right after I turned legal… why?”

“Wh- only a few months?” Dee looked at him with a concerned expression and Roman winced, self-consciousness about the scars on his face creeping into his mind. “Roman… are you okay?”

“Of course I’m okay.” Roman scoffed. “I’m safe, I found Remus… I’m apparently rich too, which is nice.”

“You don’t have to be,” Dee said with a shrug. “Heck, hardly anyone here is completely okay. Thomas is probably the most alright, as he was never a slave, but... a few months isn’t long enough for that.”

“For what?” Roman sighed, feeling exhausted. Dee confused him, and he was still slightly jealous that Remus remembered him better.

“Long enough to be okay,” he said gently. “Emotionally, mentally.”

“I…” Roman wasn’t sure what to make of that. He’d been trying so hard to convince himself he was fine because he was physically safe, and now Dee was here saying that wasn’t enough? Was he trying to make Roman fall apart? 

“Sorry.” Janus stepped back again, hugging himself with one arm. “I... it’s none of my business, really. I hardly even know you, after all.”

“You helped him,” Roman whispered, trying and failing to keep his voice steady. Janus looked at him in surprise. “You helped him keep trying. He remembers that. More than he told you.”

“Who, Remus?” Janus frowned. “What do you mean?”

“He remembers talking to you... he seems so much better when he’s near you or talking about that.” Roman swallowed the lump in his throat. “He remembers telling you about me, but he doesn’t remember me.”

“I’m... I’m sorry.” 

“It’s not-”

“If Patton didn’t remember me, I’d be devastated,” Janus mumbled. “I’m sorry I couldn't help him more… or that we didn’t get to him sooner. It’s not your fault.”

“It’s more my fault than yours,” Roman said.

“Then I’ll try to stop blaming myself.” 

“Oh.” Roman looked over, frowning curiously. Janus stared back, one eyebrow raised. “If I’m not okay, you aren’t okay either.” Roman tried, hoping Janus would just forget about it.

“Oh, I know I’m not okay.” Janus laughed lightly. “I’m well aware of how far I have to go until I’m actually okay.” damn. It didn’t work.

“Well, what am I supposed to do, then, if you’re so smart?” Roman sighed irritably, running a hand through his hair. “It’s not like I can just stop helping Thomas and take a vacation, or whatever it is I’d need to do.”

“Why?” Janus frowned. “A lot of people are helping Thomas. You’ve gone through a lot. You can-”

“What I’ve gone through,” Roman spun around, pressing a hand to his chest. “Other people are going through the same thing right now. Until we’re done. Until we get North Province to sign and dismantle every illegal slave market. I’m not going to stop. I said I’d help every slave in the country, and that’s what I’m going to do. Whether I’m okay or not.”

“I see.” Dee nodded thoughtfully. “I thought you were in this for Remus.”

“I am!” Roman snapped. “And I found him, and I’m not done. Seeing you and Patton reunite… I want every single person who lost someone to be able to do that. Finding Remus was my only goal for years, and I’ve done that. But that doesn’t mean I can go back on my promise to Thomas and Joan.”

“You’re an interesting person, Roman,” Janus said, putting his hands on his hips. Roman rolled his eyes. “Let me know if I can help you.”

“What-” Roman blinked in surprise when Janus turned, waving a hand goodbye as he stepped back inside.

Nothing made sense.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts? I'm REALLY loving the worldbuilding - the plot not so much. I may rewrite this story in the future - but first I want to finish this lmaoo
> 
> I'm so bad at ending things  
> how do yall want this to end? I'm open to suggestions
> 
> Love you all,  
> \- Coby/Raphael (it's a switchy day)


	18. Remus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is shorter, just a bit of character exploration with Remus before the next arc. Heh. Y'all have no idea what's coming.
> 
> Warnings: PTSD, slavery, rape/non-con mentions, food mentions, I think that's it.

Nothing made sense.

Remus squinted suspiciously across the table to where Thomas and Logan were locked in a discussion, something to do with the meeting the day before. He shifted his gaze to Roman, who looked exhausted. Like he hadn’t slept for a week. Dee had the same look - but he’d always looked tired. Maybe Roman always looked tired, too. Not like he could remember. 

Remus sighed softly, looking down to stab his oatmeal with the spoon he was holding. They kept giving him food, saying he needed to build up his strength. Strength for what? Were they tricking him, getting him ready to send and fight in the war? That would be weird, seeing as he was a green-eyed slave. 

No… he was free. He knew they were telling the truth. He’d seen the papers, and while he wasn’t the best at reading, he knew it was true. He had an identification card and everything. 

Remus looked up again, this time zeroing in on Logan’s prosthetic arm. It was interesting. He’d seen a lot of new inventions, going from mansion to mansion, and he could tell that the prosthetic was expertly made.

“I wonder how it works.” Remus hummed, taking a bite of oatmeal. The conversation fell silent for a moment, and he frowned when most of them looked at him. “What? Can’t a guy talk to himself in peace around here?”

Virgil snorted, shaking his head. A few of them chuckled, and Logan resumed what he’d been saying to Thomas.

He could use the intricate pieces of the hand. The fingers, the wrist, it was incredible. Remus wondered how hard it was to make, how expensive it had been. Probably a lot. Weird that someone as wealthy as Logan decided to help rescue slaves when he had everything handed to him on a silver platter.

Though, he did have a missing arm. Maybe he’d been born without one - Remus thought that might be possible. Or maybe he’d been injured in a train accident or a building mishap. Maybe he’d been a pirate, and lost it in an epic swordfight like he’d read about in a book recently. Hmm. Remus could see Logan as a pirate. 

Logan moved a paper, and Remus watched as the minuscule gears and pieces moved to twist the wrist, closing the fingers at the same time.

How on earth was that possible? Maybe the library upstairs had books about such a thing. He’d have to check, maybe he’d ask Roman or Virgil or Dee for help. Or Patton, though Remus didn’t know him very well.

“Remus?”

Remus jumped, spoon falling from his fingers into the now-empty bowl. Wow, he’d eaten a lot while lost in thought. Remus shook his head, looking up to find Roman was the one who had spoken.

“Yeah?”

“Are you okay?” Roman’s brow was furrowed anxiously. “You were spacing out.”

“I was thinking.” Remus shrugged. “Sorry. What did you need?”

“I was just saying I’m headed to the library to look for something if you wanted to come.” Roman stood, taking Remus’s bowl to the sink for him. Remus frowned, but shrugged it away and nodded.

“Yeah, sure.”

He stood up, ignoring Roman’s attempt to steady him. He was able to walk now, geez. He was better every day, according to the doctor dude. 

The library was familiar, and one of the places Remus felt the safest.

“What are you looking for?” he asked when they arrived. Roman waved a hand vaguely, going over to the desk in the corner. It had belonged to the previous owner - the Grayson dude everyone kept talking about. Roman hadn’t gone near it before.

“Just… I’m not sure.” Roman confessed. Remus followed him, running his fingers across the dusty surfaces of the furniture on his way. “Why?”

“Cuz I wanted to know.” 

Remus laughed, leaning on the desk as Roman opened a drawer, carefully rifling through it. He watched his brother search for a few minutes, quickly growing restless.

“Do we have any books about building stuff?” Remus asked carefully, pinching his fingers together as he waited for a response. Roman looked up, frowning slightly.

“Building? Like, houses?”

“Nah.” Remus waved a hand. “Machines. Like the train, and clocks, and stuff like that.”

“I’m not sure.” Roman left the desk for a moment, walking to the opposite corner and inspecting the shelves. 

Remus followed but elected to kneel on the couch halfway there. He was still sick, according to the doctor. That was probably why he got tired so easily. Roman turned, holding a few books he’d taken from the shelves. They were dusty, and the corner of one had been chewed on by mice, but he seemed satisfied.

“These are some engineering books,” Roman said as he gently placed them on the coffee table. “Probably out of date, since they’ve been here at least two years. I thought you liked storybooks, though.”

“I do.” Remus shrugged, taking one book and blowing the dust off the cover. “I just think machines are interesting, that’s all.”

“Alright then.” Roman chuckled, standing up and walking back over to the desk. “Let me know if you need anything.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts? Theories? We'd love to hear them!
> 
> Love you all,  
> \- Logan


	19. Logan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey broskis here's another chapter and- GASP- It's not from Roman or Remus's POV? Lol there's only a few of these in this fic so do with that what you will
> 
> Warnings: slavery mentions, anxiety, PTSD, food mentions,,,,, I think that's it

“...Logan?” Logan looked up from the papers he was working on in surprise. Remus hadn’t spoken to him since the library. And now he was here in the make-shift office, by himself?

“Ah, Remus. Are you alright?” he stood, looking him over for any possible injuries or problems. Remus hummed a bit, avoiding his gaze. Logan frowned uneasily.

“Sorry.” Remus finally said, shoulders hunching slightly. “I just…”

“I’ll keep my distance if you like,” Logan said, holding up his hands. Remus lifted his head, finally looking at him, eyes darting curiously around. 

“IwanttolookatyourarmbecauseIthinkit’sreallycool.” Remus blurted, bouncing slightly on the balls of his feet. Logan blinked, slowly sitting back down as he tried to figure out what exactly the other had said. 

“...my arm?”

“The metal one.” Remus clarified, a ghost of a smile crossing his face. “Is… sorry, I uhm… I can go if you want.”

“You can stay,” Logan said, pulling his sleeve back from the prosthetic arm. Remus’s eyes widened slightly. “I hadn’t known you were interested in mechanics.”

“I’ve been reading about them.” Remus said softly, inching toward the desk. “But I’m just curious…” 

Logan regarded him curiously, lying his arm with the palm down on the desk. He hadn’t quite seen Remus like this, in the time he’d known the other. Which, admittedly, wasn’t long. The closest would have been the other day at breakfast when Remus was watching him and Thomas talk. Though, Logan wondered now if he’d been watching Logan’s arm, and nothing else.

Previously, Remus had seemed very fragile. Common, in the slaves Logan rescued from the kinds of places he’d been. Timid, waiting constantly for something to go wrong. Logan wouldn’t have been able to say a single distinguishing thing about him other than his bright green eyes. 

Now, those eyes stared intently - intelligently - at the gears and springs that helped the prosthetic function. Remus’s fingers never stopped moving, at the hem of his shirt or curling in his hair or pinching his hands and wrists. His head tilted to one side, though he didn’t seem to notice it.

“Is it your whole arm?” Remus asked, pulling his hands back after reaching to touch the arm. “How does it work? What happened to your hand? Were you a pirate? Please say you were a pirate. What’s it made of? Do you have to oil the joints? When did-”

“I can answer your questions.” Logan laughed softly and Remus recoiled, eyes wide.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to talk…”

“It’s quite alright,” Logan promised, pushing the sleeve up past the elbow, to where the metal met his skin. “I won’t pretend to understand the technology of it, but I know the engineer worked with my doctor to connect the base piece to my nervous system.”

Remus’s eyes widened when Logan twisted the base, pulling the majority of the arm and leaving just the remainder and the base.

“Ohh, wow.” Remus slowly reached forward, tensing when Logan handed it to him. “Wh- what if I break it? I don’t want-”

“Don’t drop it, and you should be fine.” Logan adjusted his glasses. “It’s very durable.”

“I don’t know what a nervous system is.” Remus confessed, inspecting the joints carefully. “But I know what all this stuff is - I read about it. It’s like a clock, but way cooler.”

“In short, the nervous system is what sends messages from your brain to the rest of your body.” Logan chuckled, drawing upon what he’d heard from the people who helped make the arm. “It uses something called electricity.”

“I heard about that,” Remus said triumphantly. “They have electric lights now, some places!”

“Have you ever seen an android?” Logan asked, smiling when Remus gently put the arm back on the table, hands still fluttering from place to place. He nodded.

“I think so - maybe. They’re metal people, right? I think I saw one once.”

“Yes. The engineer who made this arm took most of his ideas from those, and managed to connect it to my brain instead of an android.”

“Oh, wow.” 

“Yes.” Logan carefully connected the arm to its base again, twisting the lock securely and moving the fingers a few times. “As for your questions, I do need to keep the joints oiled in order for them to work best. The material is common copper and aluminum. As for what happened-”

“You don’t have to say.” Remus blurted, shoulders hunching slightly. “I didn’t mean to ask you - uhm, I know it might have been scary.”

“Alright.” Logan smiled, relieved slightly that Remus wasn’t hurt by his hesitation. “Perhaps another time I can tell you the tale, once things are better.”

“...right.” Remus nodded, eyes flickering to the papers on Logan’s desk. “Better.”

* * *

“Logan, I need your help, we can’t find-” Logan looked up from the book Remus was showing him, surprised to see Virgil frozen in the doorway. “Oh. Remus, there you are.”

“Hi Vee.” Remus held up the book, nearly knocking it into Logan’s head. “We’re learning about androids!”

“How long have you two been up here?” Virgil asked, tugging on his bangs. “Roman’s freaking out because you aren’t in the library or your room.”

“Oh.” Remus looked sheepishly at Logan, then back at Virgil. “Sorry…”

“It’s okay.” Virgil laughed. “But you should probably go tell him you’re, like, alive.”

“Sure!” Remus closed the book, leaving it on Logan’s desk as he walked out of the room. Logan watched him go, still slightly amazed at the change that seemed to have happened. Virgil waited until he was gone to speak again.

“What the hell?”

“Wh- he was interested in my arm.” Logan said defensively, holding it up. “Apparently he’s fascinated by mechanics and machines. I was simply helping him research.”

“...I trust you.” Virgil muttered, walking over to stand by his desk. “And if Remus of all people approached you…”

“I’m as surprised as you are.” Logan chuckled, standing up and rearranging the papers and books on his desk. “After what happened in the library, I was sure he wouldn’t trust me.”

“He was smiling.” Virgil leaned across the desk, face inches from Logan’s. Logan blinked at him. “Remus was smiling, Logan. A real smile. I never saw him smile for real until now.”

“I suppose.” Logan frowned thoughtfully. “He was quite nervous upon arrival, actually. I tried my best to help him feel safe, and he became distracted when we started to talk about mechanics.”

“What do you know about mechanics?” Virgil laughed, stepping back a bit.

“Not much,” Logan confessed. “And not as much as he does. He’s been reading all he can the past few days, according to him.”

“Really?” Virgil looked surprised, glancing in the direction that Remus had gone. Logan nodded.

“He was really quite outspoken, as well. It was interesting.”

“I still feel obligated to tell you that if you make one wrong move you’re dead.” Virgil sighed, turning to leave. Logan hummed in acknowledgment. 

What an interesting turn of events indeed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not sure if I want intrulogical to be anything more than platonic, but they're definitely gonna be buddies!
> 
> Love you all,  
> -Nub


	20. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Its PTSD time, babeyyyy
> 
> Warnings: Flashbacks, nightmares, PTSD, rape/non-con, body horror, mutilation, panic attacks, blood, injuries, possible food mentions, self-deprecation

_ No….no this couldn't be happening. Roman struggled against his binds, cursing the tears that trailed down his face. He was free… he was legal he was never going back he couldn't go back he couldn't lose Remus again - fuck where was Remus? _

_ Rough hands grasped Roman’s arms, hauling him to his feet and forcing him to meet his captor's eyes. Amused, crinkled slightly by the cruel smirk the man flashed him. _

_ Roman tried to speak, do anything, but the wire pulled agonizingly at his lips. Terror flashed through him, realizing that his mouth was stitched shut again. With wire, harder to cut and sharper and so much more painful than the durable thread they’d used before. _

_ No… no no no no no. Roman squeezed his eyes shut as he was manhandled onto a surface, lying on his back and so incredibly defenseless and exposed and fuck fuck fuck he couldn't be back here he was supposed to be safe… _

_ He didn’t want this he didn’t want to do this again he didn’t want to have to heal again or cry again or try and escape or be sold again and Thomas would never find him because Roman was never that lucky was he, oh god he hated this so much- _

_ “Roman, stop it!” _

_ Shit shit shit shit he hated not being able to talk he hated being here he hated everything on the goddamn planet. Roman found his hands suddenly free and scrambled to try and get the wire from where it held his mouth shut.  _

_ Strong, gentle hands grabbed his wrists and Roman screamed, the wire ripping into his skin as the taste of blood filled his mouth. _

_ “Stop it! I- Fuck!” _

_ Roman struggled uselessly against the other, sobs heaving from his chest. They wouldn’t let go - he needed them to let go! _

_ “Can I get some help in here?! I don’t know what-” _

_ God, they were yelling way too loud. They were getting others… Roman didn’t want to do this again. He didn’t want to be a toy again, he’d gotten out of that way before he’d been freed he didn’t want this to happen. _

_ “Wh- what are you doing!?” _

_ “I’m trying to-” _

_ The hands suddenly flew from Roman’s wrists and he yanked them back, pressing them over his mouth in an attempt to stem the bleeding.  _

_ “You can’t just- ugh, nevermind.” That voice was different. That was… wait. Roman blinked a few times, the images of his previous owners wavering slightly. That was Remus’s voice. _

_ “If you two would stop bickering, we could focus on actually helping him.” A third voice sighed. It was familiar too, actually. Roman gently moved a finger across his top lip, finding only lumpy scars instead of wire.  _

_ “Wh- I walk in here to find this idiot attacking-” _

_ “I wasn’t attacking him!” The first voice snapped. Wait… that was Virgil. “He was having a nightmare, and I was just-” _

_ “Both of you get out or shut up.”  _

_ Roman clamped his eyes shut again, shaking his head a few times before opening them. When he did, the blurry sight of his and Virgil’s bedroom met his gaze, instead of the hellscape he’d been dreaming of. _

Oh. It had been a dream. 

“Roman?” Dee was crouched in front of his bed, brow furrowed slightly. “Can you tell me where you are?”

“I-” Roman lowered his hands, looking from Dee to his brother and Virgil standing a few yards away. “I… I can’t…”

“I’ll go get you some water,” Virgil said, spinning around and hurrying from the room. Roman watched him go, still reeling from the shift in the atmosphere. 

“Just breathe, Roman. You’re doing well.” Janus soothed, frowning down at where Roman’s hands rested. “May I see your mouth?”

“Wh-” Roman blinked a few times as he registered the taste of blood still filling his mouth. Oh, shit. He’d reopened the goddamn scars again.

“Is everything alright?” Roman glanced at the door when Thomas appeared in the opening, hair tangled from sleep.

“Everything is just fine,” Janus said, half to Roman and half to Thomas. Thomas nodded slowly. 

“I’m…” Roman swallowed thickly, turning to where Remus stood, looking stricken. “I’m okay. Sorry.”

“No need for apologies,” Dee said casually. “Do you think you could stand? We’ll need to clean you up in the kitchen.”

“Right.” Roman slowly got to his feet, wincing at the physical contact but letting Remus steady him. He was safe. Remus was here, Thomas was here. He was fine. Of course, he was fine. It was just a stupid dream. Dee was also here, but Roman didn’t know him as well. He was still safe, though.

“Here.” Virgil met them in the hallway, gently pressing a cup of water into Roman’s hand. Roman drank it all in one go, trying to wash away the taste of blood.

“Thanks.” he forced a smile, wincing when it pulled at the reopened cuts on his bottom lip. 

“Let’s just get you patched up,” Thomas said, pulling the medical supplies from a cupboard. Roman nodded, taking a seat at the kitchen table. Remus joined him, sitting nervously on the edge of his chair. 

Roman closed his eyes, hating the terror that filled him as Thomas inspected the wounds. He knew Thomas wouldn’t hurt him… but that didn’t stop him from being scared out of his mind. 

Maybe Dee was right… Roman really wasn’t okay.

* * *

“Hey Ro?” Roman looked up from the book he was reading, worried immediately by the timid voice his brother was using.

“What’s up, Remus? You okay?” 

Remus sat heavily on the couch next to him, wringing his hands. Roman frowned.

“Wh… I…” Remus took a deep breath, finally meeting Roman’s eyes. “What did… what did they do to you?”

“Oh.” Roman closed his book, setting it to the side as he understood what Remus was talking about. They’d talked several times about what Remus remembered, working with him so he was comfortable here, but Roman hadn’t really said anything to Remus about his own experience yet.

“I… I just… I was really worried about you.” Remus continued softly. “Y-you didn’t seem like yourself, and…”

“It’s okay,” Roman said gently. “I’m sorry you had to see me like that…”

“What happened?” Remus asked again, shoulders hunching. “Why… why do you have so many scars, when you have green eyes? Why did… I just…”

“People… they’re not all nice.” Roman sighed, running a hand through his hair. “You know how it is for green-eyed slaves - a bit, at least.” Remus nodded. “Decorations, toys, stuff like that. It drove me crazy… I ended up being a labor slave for a lot of the time we were apart.”

“Oh.”

“These…” Roman reached up and brushed the scabbed over cuts on his lip. “I guess I talked too much for that particular master. And he didn’t want me for… he wanted a plaything, I guess.” Remus nodded silently. Roman cringed. “So, he… stitched my mouth shut.”

“Oh.” 

“Yeah.”

The library fell silent for a few minutes, and Roman wondered if it had been a bad idea to be so honest with his brother. Before he could apologize, though, Remus spoke first.

“Well, you don’t talk too much for me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, Janus was right. Roman's fucked up.
> 
> Also, I'm debating two different ways to take this story.  
> Way one, it's a lot longer and may take a while to update for plot reasons.  
> Way two, we end it soon with a happy ending instead of more angsty plot things.
> 
> Thanks! <3  
> -Toby


	21. Remus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay! This is the last chapter for a while, because I'm at a crossroads. I'm not sure if I want to make a sequel for the next arc or continue it in this book, but I'm taking a break from this one to figure it out and get it started.  
> So, enjoy some fluff between Remus and Logan because they are babey.
> 
> Warnings: food mentions, angst, PTSD, rape/non-con mentions, basically mentions of everything previously in this book, and fluff

Remus felt awful. He hadn't thought about what Roman might have gone through, the past few years. To be fair, he didn't remember his brother. But he's gotten to know him again. He'd known Roman was also a slave and had green eyes - though they were darker green than Remus's were. 

Roman had just seemed so… invincible. He was emotional, yeah, but he was scared and battle hardened and… Remus didn't know why he'd imagined his brother wasn't hurt by all that happened. He just… hadn't thought about it.

Well, he was thinking about it now. And he hated it.

Remus scowled down at the book he was reading. Well, he'd planned on reading it. Instead, he was just sitting here thinking about what Roman had told him. What had caused the scars on his lips...

Remus understood… a bit. He'd been a toy - he'd been  _ treated _ like a toy - for as long as he could remember. But he'd been intimidated, weakened, maybe tied down a few times. But… hardly anyone was willing to scar a green-eyed slave. He knew that, at least.

Not only that, but Remus just  _ knew _ other things had happened to him. Roman had remembered him the whole time, tried to escape and find him… he'd definitely been punished for that. Remus only remembered giving up, accepting his fate. He didn't remember a brother to miss and search for. He'd… he couldn't really ever understand what Roman went through.

He absolutely  _ hated _ it. 

Remus looked over to the desk, where Roman was working in teaching Virgil to read. He felt so useless… he wasn't well enough to help with much and he didn't remember enough to help Roman, either. 

Remus searched his mind, trying to find something he remembered, only to come up blank once again. The earliest thing he remembered was Dee. That had been… years after he lost Roman. His memory had already been shit by then. 

Roman remembered everything, supposedly. He remembered growing up here, he remembered the plague Remus had apparently survived, he remembered being sold and separated…

Remus just remembered pain. The best memories he had were sitting outside with Roman the past few weeks, and… it wasn't the same. It would never be the same. 

He knew, really, Roman wasn't mad at him for forgetting. He knew it wasn't his fault. That didn't stop him from feeling guilty whenever he thought about it, which was… most of the time. 

Remus sighed softly, closing his book and getting to his feet as quietly as possible. Roman and Virgil didn't seem to notice, so he slipped out of the room and made his way downstairs to the kitchen.

Patton was there, cooking something while he spoke to Dee who sat at the table. Remus wasn’t really sure what he was talking about, too distracted to pay attention.

If Remus remembered Roman, they’d be closer. Like Patton and Dee. They’d be happier. Roman would be happier. 

“You okay?” Remus blinked a few times, shaking his head to clear it when he realized both of them were looking at him.

“Huh?”

“We said Hi, but you kinda just spaced out.” Patton chuckled. “No worries!”

“Oh.” Remus smiled sheepishly, running a hand through his hair. “Hi.”

“... what’s up?” Dee asked, raising an eyebrow. Remus shrugged.

“Nothing, just taking a break from reading now that I can actually do things by myself.” Technically true, he’d hated having to be taken care of like that. Ugh, this was awful. Maybe if he could find Logan, he wouldn’t have to talk about emotions. All he talked about with Logan was mechanics and science. “D’you know where Logan is?”

“I think he was in town with Thomas,” Patton said, turning to stir whatever it was he was cooking.

“Oh.” Remus felt a pang of disappointment. He liked talking about mechanics with Logan.

“They should be back soon, though,” Dee said, smiling weakly at him.

“Okay.” Remus slumped into a chair, sitting backward on it so he could rest his chin on the back. This was so weird. He still wasn’t used to just… being here. Not being a slave, or something. It was weird, and he was bored. Well… not bored like painfully bored, just… restless. He felt like he had to do something, but he didn’t know what.

“Oh hey,” Patton suddenly looked up from his cooking. “I just remembered! Jay, can you watch the stove for me real fast?”

“Yeah.” Dee stood, stretching as he took Patton’s place.

“I wanted to show you something!” Patton gestured for Remus to follow, and Remus did. He trusted Patton. The realization seemed to smack him like a sack of wet mice. He trusted Patton. That was nice.

“What is it?” Remus asked curiously, following Patton outside.

“We were taking inventory of everything we had here,” Patton started across the lawn to a large weathered barn. “And I thought you’d like the stuff we found out here.”

“Okay…” Remus couldn't help but feel anxious. He did trust Patton… but this was weird. The other pulled open the door, letting sunlight spill over the interior of the barn. As soon as it did, Remus’s jaw fell open and all skepticism was gone. 

“M-machines!?”

“Old, and broken, but yeah.” Patton smiled, dusting off his hands. “And they're all yours, legally speaking. I know you and Roman said we could take what we needed… but this is yours.”

“Can I take them apart?!” Remus tried to contain his excitement, but couldn't help bouncing on the balls of his feet. “Can I take them apart and build things?!”

“Do whatever you want with them, kiddo.” Patton smiled. “They’re yours. I’ve got no say in the matter.” Remus pulled the other into a quick hug, babbling thanks, and darted into the barn to inspect the old rusted metal.

* * *

“Knock knock?” Remus looked up from what he was doing when he heard Logan’s voice. Logan! Logan was here! “Can I come in?”

“Yeah!” Remus jumped up, carefully putting the tiny android down and bouncing over to him. “Did you see all this stuff? Patton says it’s mine - I can do whatever I want with it! Isn’t that great!”

“I’m glad you’re pleased with it, though we’ll have to get you some more modern technology for you when we can.” Logan adjusted his glasses. Remus’s eyes widened.

“Wh- we’re gonna get more?!” Remus hugged Logan tightly, then spun around to retrieve what he’d made. “Look, Logan, he’s a little person!”

“You… I see.” Logan gently cupped the android in his hands when Remus held it out. “Is he functional? I didn’t think we had the technology here to make such things.”

“I took them apart and built him,” Remus said, beaming. Logan nodded, watching as Remus cranked the key on it's back. The small android lifted its head, then put it back down, and repeated the action. “He can’t do a lot right now, because I don’t have enough small pieces, but isn’t it great?”

“I’m very impressed.” Logan looked up, meeting Remus’s gaze with shining eyes. Remus blinked a few times, realizing that Logan was just as excited as he was. “How did you do it?”

“I’ll show you!” Remus grabbed Logan’s hand, pulling him into the barn.

He was still worried about Roman, and he still felt bad for losing his memory, but right now Remus felt happy. For the first time he could remember, Remus felt like everything was going to be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts? Do you want me to just continue this book, or do you want me to make a sequel for Roman's impending arc? let me know!  
> Love you all,  
> -Nub

**Author's Note:**

> So yeah! Whadda you think? This idea is based on one I had AGES ago when I was writing fics in another fandom, which is where the green eyes come from (it was relevant in that fandom and I decided to stick with it here)  
> The updates won't be as consistent as I'd like, but this fic is still a work in progress. I just really wanted to share what I have so far.  
> lemme know what you think! <3  
> love you all,  
> -Coby


End file.
